Category Archives: Your Day Your Way

Your Day Your Way

Ask Jenny – Booze Issues.

Dear Jenny,

My father and his partner very kindly offered to host our wedding reception in their back garden. They agreed to pay for the marquee, food and booze which was amazingly kind of them. We were going to have our reception in a hotel where, after the meal, we would have had a pay bar – free booze for 80 guests over 7 hours is not in our budget!

However, I am a bit worried that my father has underestimated the amount of wine we will need. I have worked out that there is 2.5 glasses each of Prosecco for the first two hours and I have removed non-drinkers from that equation. I don’t know how much wine he has bought and I don’t know how to broach the subject. More booze is out of our budget but we will buy some more if we have to rather than running out on our special day and in a venue that is in the middle of nowhere!

How do I go about sorting this out without offence being caused?

Mimi x


Hi Mimi,

I love a back garden wedding! How generous of your Dad to host too, it sounds as though you are feeling a little anxious about the whole thing so you need to find the strength to be diplomatic, and approach him to discuss the finer details.

You can use this opportunity to be assertive, mature, and build on your relationship with your Father. He is doing a very generous thing by hosting and taking the heat financially off of you guys, but there is an element of relinquishing control that most Brides to be find challenging.… View the full post.


The Pressure Of Having The Most Immense Hen Party EVER.

Charlotte: I hear this often. In fact I was one of those girls that felt it.

After attending so many amazing themed/organised within-an-inch-of-their-life events where everyone had the best time ever….I felt a huge amount of pressure to pull off something equally as awesome.

Well there was my first epic fail. It’s not so much you (as in the bride) that should be creating this event, it should be a collaborative effort from all of your best girls. Yes, even if you are the worlds greatest control freak. I started off trying to do too much of it myself (“I am always the “party planner” so why should this be any different” was my initial thought) and what with a wedding to organise in 4 months managed to get myself in a bit of a pickle.

Luckily for me I have an enthusiastic sister and an experienced hen-do planning best friend so they took the reigns and left me to worry about ceremony readings and canapés.

Rule number one – DELEGATE.

Rule number two – make it clear what kind of thing makes you happy/laugh/you enjoy. And what type of thing genuinely doesn’t. Just this week I heard about a girl that had told her maids that under no uncertain terms did she want any kind of greased up “fireman” removing his uniform and swinging his um…hose (?) in front of her to the dulcet tones of “You Can Leave Your Hat On”.

They ignored her.

Firman Sam not only covered her new fancy frock in a rather unpleasant baby-oil sheen but insisted she lick whipped cream off of his…crotch.… View the full post.


Ask Jenny – Big Plates O’Meat (feet).

Hi Jenny,

I am having shoe issues. In fact, the issues don’t actually lie with the shoes but with my feet.

Whilst only being 31 I have bunions on both of my feet, I also have something called clawed toes (though I like to call them Claude, sounds a bit more exciting/exotic)… basically it looks like my feet are holding on all the time.

Trying to find shoes that fit, look nice and are comfortable is not easy at the best of times. As I write this I am surrounded by shoes that I have bought that fitted but on the first wear tore my feet to shreds. I basically live in converse boots.

I am getting married in September and will be wearing a Candy Anthony dress, it’s a short dress and requires a “statement shoe”. In addition my groom is only a couple of inches taller than me and I can’t walk in high heels.

I bought some GLORIOUS shoes from Bespoke Big Day, the kitty with a 1.5″ heel and encrusted in purple glitter. They are so beautiful I nearly cried. I did indeed shed a couple of tears when I only managed to squeeze one foot in – it was fine whilst I was sitting but then when I stood up my little toe went numb. Waaaaah!

With a 12 week lead time on their shoes I contacted the ever helpful Rachel at BBD and I’ve ordered the next size up which will get to me in time for the wedding but I am exceedingly worried – what if they don’t fit?!… View the full post.


Ask Jenny – Ceremony Troubles.

Hi RMW amazing-ness,

I’m still pretty new to all this wedding blog glory, and am loving trawling your gorgeous polka dot pages. However, before I can get excited about our day, I’m having troubles with a big part of our day, and wonder if I might be able to ask advice from you uber-experts and your lovely readers.

See, the thing is, and maybe I’ve been totally naive about this, but I’m really surprised by how little freedom we seem to have with what we can do for our ceremony! For us, it feels like this is the most important part of the day, and what we see as a way of defining our commitment and future together, but yet there seem to be so many restrictions.

We don’t want to do a church service, but would quite like to involve a religious reading in the service a) because we’ve found one we like and b) to nourish those guests for whom religion is important. We’d also love to involve a humanist celebrant, and keep the service light and full of love. But low and behold, I’ve found that you can’t have anything religious in a civil ceremony. This includes humanist stuff, even though in England you can’t have a fully humanist service.

I’m at such a loss of how to create a service that is meaningful to us?! We’ve considered just ‘getting the legal bit’ done the day before, it feels a bit like too much hassle the day before W day (not to mention an extra cost).… View the full post.


Facebook My Wedding?

Morning lovelies, Charlotte here…*waves*, after a recent discussion with Madame Pamela and the success of her Lack Of Aisle Style post we asked her to return and share her desire for a distinct lack of social media coverage for W-day… always please leave your thought in the comments box below!

OK, so, the Big C and I will, ever so politely, be asking our guests not to post our wedding photos on social networking sites. The reason for this is not because we have an exclusive, six-figure deal with a celebrity magazine (completley shocking, I know) and neither is it because I’ve come over all diva-esque in a ‘Mental pictures, no cameras please’ Rita Ora kind of way (again, somewhat shocking, but with just eight weeks to go I’m trying to keep my inner Mariah on lock down – don’t want the Big C ‘doing one’ because the pressure of finding eight puppies as white as the snow got too much).

You see, I’m the type of girl that is all about the foreplay (don’t worry; this post isn’t going to be about those type of photos!). I live for the build up to events and momentous occasions. That girl’s night out that isn’t until the end of the month? Well I’ve already planned 57 possible outfits, debated, discarded and decided on bars and clubs, run around the house in false eyelashes so long that really they belong to Ermentrude the cow (‘Just needed to check that yes, they are totally impractical and therefore truly suitable’) and made 162 phone calls to my best friend making nothing but an excitable ‘eeeeeeeee’ noise down the phone (we have an understanding that if it goes on longer than seven minutes she can hang up).… View the full post.


Ask Jenny – Project Wedding Dress.

Dear Charlotte & all the RMW lovelies (including Adam!),

I’m hoping you and all your gorgeous readers will be able to help me.

I’m getting married on 27 July next year, hopefully outside, in the Oxfordshire countryside. As the Boy is paying for the whole day, the budget is rather tight and as such I dont have the budget for the dress of my dreams (Monique Lhuillier’s Scarlet) or anything like it. I have a budget of around £500. So I was thinking of getting my dress made instead – it’ll be one of a kind and exactly what I want – or at least that’s the theory.

So…..what I’m hoping you can help with is this: have any of your readers had their dress made? how did they find the process? and more importantly – how much did they spend? and could they recommend someone? I’m willing to travel to Wiltshire, Gloucestershire, all of Oxfordshire, Bristol, Bath, Northamptonshire and probably even London!

Hope you can help!

Anni x

P.S – Absolutely love those beautiful polka dot pages, I am (as Naomi would say) “all over them, like a pigeon on a chip!”

Dearest Anni,

I felt compelled to respond to your appeal for dress making advice, not because I had my own dress made (although I did have my bridesmaids dresses all hand made), but rather because my own history with wedding dresses probably renders me the most qualified to advise….!

Never having had a wedding dress made from scratch, I have no idea if your budget will allow for the dress of your dreams – our readers should and will have buckets of advice and information for you, so you will leave here better armed for Project Wedding Dress.… View the full post.


Ask Jenny – Coping with Stress


I am getting married next year (we think)…we have only been engaged for 2 weeks and already I am feeling stressed and under pressure!

The main problem is I have a lot of family…my parents are divorced and have re-married and my mother divorced again….so you can see the headache!!

My fiancé hates wedding stuff and also hates a fuss (also he has been married before and had quite a big wedding) however me – Miss ONLY CHILD… dreamed of this day FOREVER (!) is the opposite!!

So the compromise…hence writing this e-mail…is to have a destination wedding possibly in Tuscany. I have looked online and I just don’t know where to start. We love the idea of a reception in a private villa eating outside with candles and lots of red wine :) but at the same time do we really want to stay in a villa with all of my many parents. (I have a Mom, step Mom, Dad, step Dad. Then my Mom has a boyfriend and my step Dad has a girl friend-my fiancé is a bit boring and just has a Mom and Dad ;) )

Plus we have lots of wonderful friends who would be up for an Italian adventure…please help me….please :)

Another Jenny xx

Hi Jenny (do we have a lovely common name, or what?)

Cor if you’re feeling stressed now, how will you feel in the final few weeks? Ask yourself what you want from your wedding, to have the big white wedding, or to be married to the man you love?… View the full post.


Music Is The Fabric That Binds Us.

Music is, for myself and my delicious man, a part of the fabric that binds us. In our early dating stages, music was the main thing we talked about, danced to and bonded over most. Saturday afternoons were spent prancing around in my underwear (me, not Gavin) with a big old school set of headphones on, attached to his iPod whilst he showed off his extensive iTunes library and musical trivia knowledge. Not much has changed.

Music has always and will always fill our home. Whether it’s chilled out tunes while cooking, hardcore rock while cleaning or background party music when having friends around, we will always find an excuse to play something.

Luckily we have the exact same taste in music. Generally speaking we tend to love anything Acoustic, Folk-y, Rock-y, Grunge-y, Metal-y, Punk-y or Bass-y. Rock chick, yes I am. So how the hell do you incorporate that into your wedding and make sure everyone else (who maybe aren’t so fond of having their eardrums blown out) enjoys themselves too…

We asked our guests what they wanted to listen to! This brainchild was born out of a bit of RMW inspiration. We had a slot on our RSVP postcards that read “Name a song guaranteed to get you dancing”. The results were both varied and spectacular. I have since then seen this on many a wedding planning post and still to this day think it’s a great way to make people feel involved, whilst taking the pressure off you to come up with a playlist.… View the full post.


Ask Jenny – Shoe Issues.

Hi Jenny

I’m having a big dilemma about wedding heels! I’ve got a lovely pair of ivory peep toes that I wanted to wear for the church, but they’re not comfortable, so I bought a pair of flats to wear in the evening. Only then I realised that if I put flats on, my dress will then be far too long! Does this matter? Should I not wear my first pair of heels, and find a more comfortable mid-height heel/wedge instead? Or should I stick to flats and be super comfy all day?! I’m getting married in Ibiza, so flats would be perfectly in keeping with my beach wedding (church ceremony, then reception at beachside restaurant) but a few people have told me I wear heels for the church and for photos/first dance etc, for posture.

I have no idea what to do, and time is running out. First dress fitting fast approaching!


Dear Jenny,

Ok I’ve a few suggestions for you my dear, how in love are you with your painful ivory peep toes…? I would perhaps consider keeping them for your photographs, and buying another pair of heels that aren’t going to cripple your tootsies, no one needs to see a bride walking like John Wayne by the end of the ceremony, and you will have better things to worry about than where your next plaster is coming from.

It’s important your dress hangs right, you don’t want to be picking up the bottom so you don’t trip over it when you walk, so maybe you could wear some gorgeous beachy boho flats, and have your dress taken up to accommodate them?… View the full post.


A Lack Of Aisle Style……?

*Hello lovelies…Charlotte here (albeit briefly). I am going to introduce you to Pamela (although for some of you that read her hilarious comments she needs no introduction at all)…resident RMW reader and ravishing redhead. Pamela is going to share her biggest wedding “fear”…please feel free to leave her some love at the end of this post.

Pamela: The last day of 2012’s Easter bank holiday will now forever be known (and certainly not affectionately so) as ‘Meltdown Monday’. The Big C had gone on an arty-farty mission to London town and I was at home alone with the dog. I was meant to be undertaking my own artistic endeavours (Chanel nail polish in ‘June’ at the ready – a pale, ‘creamsicle’ orange according to Vogue.), catching up on my reading (Heat, Look, Glamour and Marie-Claire all in a nice stack) and generally avoiding eating anything chocolate-covered and egg shaped (final dress fitting booked in for 30 June – must have arms like Jennifer Aniston and a torso like Jennifer Lopez). Thoroughly busy day planned, yes?

I am, on the whole, good at being alone. I like being solitary. I can amuse myself for hours before I even have to speak to another soul. In fact, it’s more like days. When we go on our holidays the Big C always has to remind me that other folk require a certain level of engagement, “Pamela, you have been laid on that sunlounger, in the same floppy hat, for three days straight now. The fact that you are on your fifth book and flip yourself over every 45 minutes is indeed the only indication you have given that you are still alive.” Me told.… View the full post.