I’m willing to hedge my bets that the vast majority of you reading this post are not only planning to get hitched this year but are also attending the nuptials of another couple too.
I’m attending three this year, a considerable reduction from the seven I attended in 2012, but I’m still experiencing the sartorial struggles that come with being a guest at a wedding.
Since many of my friends are marrying their other halves within months of each other it’s inevitable that I’ll be drinking, dining and dancing the night away with the same familiar faces at each of these weddings.
Call me vain, hell call me spoilt, but I just can’t bring myself to turn up to each of these special days in the same outfit. These girls (and boys) are important to me so I want to make a real effort for them and this includes dressing up for the occasion especially if there’s a theme for the day too.
So the task of finding something to wear begins…and folks I’m in a bit of a pickle.
You see the high street is awash with frocks, suits and skirts in ivory shades. Milky whites, soft creams, the crispest of alabasters – you can blame fashion forward folks such as Ms McCartney, Mr A Wang and The Row for the popularity of these hues for Spring/Summer 2013 – literally everything leans towards the neutral end of the spectrum. So after hours of traipsing through the shops – both online and in person I’ve found my outfit of choice.
And it’s white.
And lovelies therein lies the rub.
Because you’re not supposed to wear white to a wedding are you. For this colour palette is the preserve of the bride and hers alone. Or is it?
K-Mid and Pippa demonstrated just how beautiful and unifying an all-white entire wedding party looks. After all utilising neutral shades is not only incredibly flattering but is a surefire way to imbue your day with a distinctly modern edge too. So could this colour palette be extended to guests too?
Should we frown upon guests who wear white? Ivory and cream colour palettes are clean and contemporary and perfect for summer so you can’t help but see how some folks might want to wear them to a special occasion. Just how likely is it that a guest in a pale frock will overshadow the belle of the ball anyway? And who decided that guests – namely of the female variety – shouldn’t wear ivories and creams anyway since the ‘white’ wedding dress is a fairly modern concept.
It’s not just white that gets the short end of the stick either. The wearing of any shade of black is generally frowned upon too because of the connotations it has with funerals, death and grief.
Personally I think this is a shame. We’re no longer a nation of Victorians devoted to demonstrative displays of mourning and thus I don’t think that the same associations should be made. In fact, I remember attending one wedding of a friend of mine where a guest wore a jet black silk shift and thinking how chic she looked.
It was a lightbulb moment for me. A moment of dawning realisation that actually I didn’t have to compromise on my personal style when attending a wedding. That it was actually ok to wear what you wanted to wear…within reason.
With coloured wedding gowns – such as blush pink, baby blues and the mellowest of yellows – gaining popularity would it be/ is it deemed acceptable to wear white because the bride is sporting a candy hue. Consequently, does the shade that the bride is wearing then become taboo, off limits?
In the end I decided not to go for the white dress that I fell in love with. Instead I’ve opted for a blocky number a la Audrey Hepburn because I don’t want to risk upsetting my friend nor do I want to be subject to ominous stares from those guests who don’t approve.
How do you feel about the wearing of white to a wedding when you’re not the bride?
Would it bother you if a guest turned up to your big day dressed in an ivory get-up or would you be unfazed – you’re the bride after all.
Would you encourage your guests to dress monochromatically to tie in perfectly with your wider colour theme?
Have you worn black to a wedding? Were you subject to ‘what was she thinking’ stares from across the dancefloor?
I want to know all about it…
All my love Lolly xxx