Charlotte: It’s Spring people, and you know what that means right? a little bit of sunshine and those hemlines will be rising…. Which (unless you are one of those lucky types with a naturally dark complexion) means a pasty not-seen-daylight-in-months pair of pins. Now, I’m not about to give you a big old lecture on the risks associated with basking yourself in a bunch of UVA/UVB rays (because you already know how dangerous it is right?) but I thought we might have a wee discussion about the best alternative. Yes that’s right folks, a good old bottle of the fake stuff. Tan in a can as it were. And when I say discussion I mean we’ll talk about our experiences and what products we rate – then you gorgeous lot can share, ok?
After many many years spent as a dancer I am only too au fait with looking like I had a giant satsuma for a bonce (no really, massive moon head on small dancers body and you do kind of resemble a toothpick with an oversized tangerine on the end – Avon bronzing pearls in “tropical” circa 1997…avoid at all costs).
I do not in any way condone this look. It is not pretty and it is not clever (especially when combined with blue glittery eyeshadow and a bright neon catsuit but that is a different story entirely…) and in fact as a rule, nowadays I do not put any bronzing lotion potion anywhere near my face at all. Unless you count the faintest hint of “warmth” powder by Bare Minerals when I am on my jolly holidays…
But my goodness do I plaster my body in it. I love a good glow, and it makes me feel just that little bit better to be the proud owner of a non-translucent pallor. My favourite faker is Dove nourishing every-day tan in light/medium that only smells ever-so faintly of hobnobs. I don’t actually put it on every day (I think it can be a tad drying) but usually two nights on the trot every week or so. I don’t use any other moisturiser before hand and I do leave it a good ten minutes before I put clothes back on (although it says you only have to wait five) – to make sure it doesn’t go all wonky. I also exfoliate regularly with the Body Shop coconut scrub to avoid weird patchiness and only put the smallest remnants of self tan on my feet and backs of hands (had dreadful spray tan once where I remained white except for day-glo toes and cuticles….tragic).
For more of a tan tan (used before I have to be seen in public donning a bikini) I like Piz Buin – the creamy version not the mousse, it’s tinted so you can see exactly where you are putting it (and which areas you have potentially missed!) I also love a bit of stuff with shimmer to go over the top – every summer Estee Lauder bring out this immense oil with gold shiny bits in and it makes your limbs appear all lithe and mermaid-esque.
In fact I’m pretty sure it’s called “Goddess”….figures.
Jenny: I started fake tanning at the tender age of 14 – It was 1994. It was Piz Buin Self Tan, and it was applied to my legs by my dear Mum whilst I stood on the dining room table! Fake tan wasn’t really the wonder product back then, it was just generally orange and stank of curry. I did however get some comments from the girls in the year above at school who wanted to know how I managed to get such bronzed legs when my face, arms and chest were distinctly pale and freckly!
My fake tan strategy is the more you pay the better the product. I’ve been down the St Moritz route (from Savers for about £3 – supposed to be the same as St Tropez – it’s not). I’ve tried using the dodgy wipes (hello streaks!) I’ve tried the Johnsons Holiday skin (still stinks of curry) and on my skin it works better with a base tan, as it really enhances my natural colour – which is why I suppose, they call it Holiday Skin!
My ultimate product in self tanning is St Tropez Whipped Bronze, applied with a mitt, it goes on evenly (providing you have exfolidated and moisturised first of course) and once it’s developed and you’ve rinsed off the top residue it leaves you with a natural colour, which is buildable if you decide to go darker. I prefer the whipped bronze to the lotion because the coverage is so much smoother.
Wedding day skin saw me head to toe in my favourite product: Mac Face and Body Foundation in C2. I had a base coat of St Tropez whipped bronze which I applied a few days previously, but the Mac product just helped to disguise any blotches and freckles and helped to give me confidence with having my arms on show. I didn’t want to be an orange bride, its bad enough I look back and regret my hair style on the big day, I didn’t want to look back and wonder why on earth I applied so much fake tan. I didnt’ however want to look anaemic. My skin isn’t creamy pale it’s blue and veiny.
I just didn’t want to look like a lump of stilton walking up the aisle! The things we obsess about huh?
Naomi: I have a bit of a bizarre relationship with fake tan. I was a late bloomer.
Many a night in my teens were spent pale and erm… interesting on the dance floor of many a club. It wasn’t until University that I realised that I was about the only female who did not smell of biscuits/roast chicken/curry sauce. My friends would religiously slather on a layer of the stuff before every night out. Rather than feel pressure to look a certain way, I kind of felt like I was denying myself a pamper ritual and so started to experiment with various forms of self tan.
I have to say, it wasn’t pretty. Several rain dotted Sun Shimmer outings, green palms (bleach does not remove fake tan from your hands apparently) and tan mitts that turn your tumble dryer into a big biscuit smell infuser for all other clothing, I would love to say I gave up. But I didn’t… I became addicted. Fake tan is like crack (I imagine). Once you start using it, it’s hard to ween off. The morning after the golden glow has worn off, you emerge from the shower to face a mirror depicting a sheet of tracing paper for skin and shock the holy hell out of yourself. “Was I always this white?!” I’d think to myself. That’s when I realised I had a problem.
So the only thing to do was go cold turkey. And what better time that the purse-string-strangling months of wedding planning. No longer would I spend 22 British Pounds Stirling per bottle of Vita Liberata – Silken Chocolate (the best I’ve ever used). And my methods worked. Aside from the odd dousing around the time of the RMW photoshoot, my hen do and the wedding, I went completely without fake tan for the best part of a year sporting the whole white hair, white skin look. And it was incredibly liberating.
Now, I’ve chased the summer around the world for 10 months and my skin is sporting a good glow, (Responsibly achieved with factor 30+ everyday). But as summer turns to winter here in Upside Down Land, I wonder if I’ll don a mitt at some stage. If so, I’m pretty out of practice, so any handy tan tips would be greatly appreciated you bunch of beauties.
Vix: I LOVE fake tan, almost as much as perfume! I like to have a lovely glow all year round, it makes me feel good even if I am covered up from head to toe.
I have a couple of favourites, for everyday use I use Dove Summer glow, this is perfect for my skin and it gradually builds up a nice light tan, they even do one with a bit of sparkle in for nights out. I do have to exfoliate daily as it can build up in areas. I also tried Johnsons Holiday Skin but my sensitive skin just flared up in a rash which doesn’t look good and it was so itchy…
The other tan I use is Ambre Solaire No Steaks Bronzer, it is (for me) the best on the market, you can spray all over, even upside down and it’s actual spray is nice and light, it dries really quick so you don’t have to hang around… AND it smells all apricoty – Yum. I am contemplating a spray tan for the wedding but I have not had one before, I think I need to try it out, but then again I am used to my own tans now.
One question with regards to a professionsl spray tan, do you do it the day before or two days before? I don’t want to get stains on my dress and also I live in fear of smelling like toast and mushrooms on the big day!!
Hmmmmm what to do!!??
Big Non-Tangoed Love
Charlotte, Jenny, Naomi and Vix xxx
Tan…I am obsessed. My dear old dad despairs of it…two red-headed daughters…one (my sister) with a peaches and cream, Nicole Kidman-esque complexion who is more than happy to be pale and interesting…the other who well, just isn’t…
As a teenager I used to layer the stuff on, and whenever my dad used to point out that the patches, streaks and spots quite frankly looked ridiculous, I was always ready with the retort, “I’d rather be patchy than pale.” Something to live by! In fact, I even photocopied my dad an article from Cosmo and popped it in his work briefcase about how fake tan makes you look thinner…
Around uni time, as well as more ranges of fake tan, (I upped the stakes from Sun Shimmer to St Tropez), I also discovered Ibiza. And hair extensions. And spent three delightful summers looking like Christina Aguilera in the ‘Dirty’ video. The Big C has never known me as a blonde, or with quite that level of tannage or additional hair, and when he sees photos quite simply declares, “That cannot be you”.
Anyhow, after years of trying all sorts of self-tanning products I have finally discovered the best thing ever…a VersaSpa tanning booth…now in the past, I have always been sceptical about these booths (Ross from Friends springs to mind) but this is amazing! It gets every single inch of you…dries really quickly, lasts a good three to five days before you need a top up and you can pick your shade from light, medium and dark. As I enjoy a Liverpool night out, I do admit I go for the dark but for the wedding I have tried and testing the medium and am going to go for it! As my photographer said, “It’s all very well and good you looking like you’ve spent the past three weeks in Barbados but you’re going to be on photos next to people who look like they’ve spent three weeks in Bognor…”
@Vix – I am like you though and am wondering whether to do it the day before (As I usually would before a night out) or two nights before (but then I am scared I will be pale!)…it has never rubbed off on clothes before so why am I scared it will on my wedding day?
xoxo
@Pamela – Ha! it was always my Dad that used to take the mick out of my tan (and make-up/clothes in general) and funnily enough I too used to sometimes put things in his briefcase so he would get them as he arrived at work (although not usually articles on tans, more like a note saying how much I really needed a particular pair of shoes…I also used to make him nice things sometimes though as well like badges and the like)
I have never heard of VersaSpa, do they only have them in Liverpool?! sounds cool as.
And I only think tan comes “off” on clothes if it is a tinted lotion, or one of those wash-off ones – not regular self tans as they are just literally changing the colour of the top layer of your skin.
Charlotte xxx
I have tried to fake tan many a time, but it always goes very very badly wrong, I never seem to get the hang of it.
I am therefore often heard to be saying things like ‘it doesn’t really suit me and I don’t think my legs look that white’ who am I kidding, my legs are so white they appear slightly grey. I deal with this by every now and again sneaking a bottle of tan into the house, locking myself in the bathroom with candles and wine (this may be where I am going wrong) and proceeding to fake tan.
I am usually pretty pleased with the initial result, probably because of the wine, and go to bed thinking I have cracked it this time. Next morning it is a different story and I wake up to the familiar bright orange feet and legs that haven’t changed colour!!
My last escapade was for a family wedding and resulted in my future sister-in-law nicknaming me ‘trench foot orange’ from the munch bunch gang. Luckily, these things do amuse me, especially as I never seem to learn.
But, I am determined to crack it, I therefore anticipate many more disasters and more nicknames before 20 April 2013. If anyone has any tips they would be greatly appreciated!!
xxx
I am one of those annoyingly dark skinned people- I went away and excavated in Italy for six weeks pre wedding and got browner than the proverbial berry. Just as Pamela’s clever photographer pointed out, the problem with this is I LOOK like I’ve been tangoed in all the photographs, as everyone around me (including my poor Mr B) had enjoyed the delights of a sopping wet July in the UK! Hence lots of questions about whether I was wearing fake tan…. the only foil in this plan was that I caught a nasty skin thingy from the pool in Italy, which ate up big portions of the melanin in my arms, leaving them patchy and awful. If it hadn’t been for Jenny and the magic MAC, I would have been desperately sourcing a longsleeved lacy shrug thing to hide them! The MAC stuff is officially amazing, so if I wasn’t too stupid to manage any lotions and potions I would be follwing Jen’s lead on the Fake Tan brands as well…. the last time I tried any of them (Garnier Summer Body) it smelt awful and looked ridiculous- no difference at all except for one or two tiny patches of weirdness behind my calf and on my blimmin clothes!
@Pam, I reckon do the day before the day before- you will have enough to worry about without trying to lie 100% still to avoid scrubbing it off in bed and just in case anything goes wrong you have time to repair! AND you can heed your photograhper’s advice and not look like a Calippo bar with a white wrapper like I did… xxxxx
My favourite products are Fake Bake, Loreal Sublime Bronze and Xen-Tan if I’m having a spray tan. I’ve got dark hair and brown eyes with very pale skin and find they give me the most natural colour. The last year or so I’ve barely fake tanned as I’ve been saving money and tbh the main reason I do it is to stop the constant ‘God you’re so pale’ comments. Now I’m older and more comfortable in my own skin I don’t feel the pressure as much so I just tan when I can be bothered! x
@Charlotte, nooooooo love! VersaSpa is not a scouse thing! They have them in Harvey Nics spas and all over!
Aaaahhh I love a good dad. I used to email mine and I had one of the ones he sent me made up into a print and it is on the wall in the spare room. It says:
“Pamela, I am unsure if it has escaped your notice, but last time I checked your name was indeed Pamela. Not Paris, Nicole or Britney. The shoes are lovely, but learn to live within your means. You’ll just have to select from the sixty or so pairs you already have. That may be tough but thems the breaks kiddo.”
I am pale and would love to say i’m proud but I change my mind depending on the season. This winter I was pale and ‘interesting’ and now bored of husband to be laughing at my legs (not the biggest turn on when you get into bed) so I’m studying this post to find the best possible option.
I may be getting married in the Caribbean but how tanned can I get in 5 days? I think i’ll be faking it baby!
@Lucy S…a Calippo in a white wrapper! Amazing! I love Calippos – they are proving a major part of my wedding weight loss regime! And the VersaSpa magic does not rub off in bed…it dries so quick I can put my fake tan poncho on striaght afterwards. Yes, there is indeed a fake tan poncho. The Big C always moans when he sees it…went to the cinema in it last week! x
For Mighty Boosh fans- you can never be unhappy in a poncho! xx
After many a fake tan disaster I have found the Makebelieve self tan with bronzer works best for me. The colour works well with my very pale skin tone (so many disasters with overly dark tans on my pale white skin!), it has bronzer in it so you instantly look browner (and you can see where you are putting it/bits you’ve missed) and when applied with mitts it goes on so smoothly that so far I haven’t had any streaks. The bronzer layer does wash off in the shower but leaves you with the tan underneath – and you can always add another layer if you’re not as dark as you would like. I applied it every other day for the week before my wedding and showered off the bronzer that morning so no dodgy marks on my dress
xx
@Pamela – that email from your dad and the fake tan poncho have made me giggle on this very grey and rainy morning
@Pamela @Lucy S – a fake tan poncho?! where can I find me one of those?! I also don’t see anything wrong with resembling a callippo….
@LadyFushia – ah ha! Is that the one they sell in Boots with the hot girl on the front? I have always fancied trying that one. And I obviously need to try out one of these mitt items…
@Pamela – Best.Email.Ever.
Charlotte x
@Charlotte – my fake tan poncho is from Primarni…it used to be my favourite item of clothing and I actually worn it on mine and the Big C’s first ‘lets stay in and watch a film and eat pizza’ date. Since then, it has obviously been relegated in the style stakes and is now the fake tan poncho. This means it is nothing special. It just doesn’t get washed. Eeeewwww.
Don’t do fake tan – I rock pale and interesting. I haven’t got the commitment to exfoliation and buffing. Am I alone? I experimented during WAG fever, and gave up.
Didn’t bother for my wedding day as didn’t want to look like I’d been on holiday next to my pale husband, especially for a winter wedding.
You never saw Audrey or Marilyn looking bronzed, so if it’s good enough for them…
Ooh good timing or what!! I am to be bronzed in the salon for my pre wedding practise/hen night tan this week!! I am going for a spray tan, but have located a salon that does St Tropez, it’s breaking the bank a little but I am hoping it will be worth it?! As we are heading abroad in June I wanted something that would last a bit longer without having to re-apply as I don’t think we’ll be getting much of a tan in the June sun!!
Charlotte we must see pics of your blue/neon/orange situation!!
I have bought many a bottle of fake tan but I have always been too chicken to use them.
The thing is, I have ridiculously dry skin and I am terrified of patches and looking ridiculous. As I have sensitive skin, is there any scrub that won’t make me feel like I’ve been in a vat of acid?
I am a photographer and I have seen many a bride who looked beautiful at the pre-wedding shoot only to turn up on the morning of their wedding and be confronted with an orange face and palms – I kid you not. This only ever seems to happen when they don’t do a trial with the tan and do it the day before, so please ladies, don’t go too dark and make sure there is whatever they put on areas so as not to tan on your palms.
@Mel – you are quite right, Grace Kelly never rocked bronze either and she was one of the most beautiful women to walk the earth.
@Emma – seriously, it would frighten small children. We had a rather ahem “alternative” dance teacher at that time and our formation team got disqualified from a major competition for “inappropriate gyration” – she made us do a routine to Erotica by Madonna. And wear neon catsuits.
Charlotte xxx
@Charlotte – PLEASE say there is some kind of home video of the Erotica routine…ooooo I don’t mean the Kim Kardashian kind of home video (just realised how that sounded!) more, a shaky one taken on an old camcorder taken by someone’s mum!
I had one fake tan (San Tropez) when I was a bridesmaid but as I never FT I can’t really for my wedding day – I would look very odd. Similarly there will be no fake eyelashes or fake hair – because it wouldn’t look like me!
I just concentrate on buffing my cleavage instead!
Ponchos and “inappropriate gyration” – I love RMW! Haha!
I also will be giving the bottle a bit of a miss – I have skin so white my dad lovingly refers to it as blue, but last time I got spray tanned (the day of m 21st party…) I looked like the woman had rubbed me down with bisto gravy – including the “bits” that haven’t dissolved! I was too embarrassed to call her on it so I just paid (?!), said thanks and left. People actually laughed at me in the street! So I’ve vowed off it! Some people are designed to be Celtic with freckles (nice ones, not the ginger coco pop variety!) x
@Pamela – Mwah ha ha thankfully not, I had to explain to my Mum why we had been disqualified – can you imagine? looking back though I’m not sure a group of 16/17 year old girls writhing around on the floor was entirely appropriate….
@Lynsey – Celtic with freckles is beautiful – I would love some freckly bits. For my 21st I had hair like the blonde girl off of S Club 7 (tufts made erm…tufty with little silver grips) and a T-shirt that read “Pornstar” …in diamante. Even looking like you had been covered in gravy can’t have been as tragic as that.
Charlotte xxx
I love Dove summer glow and Lancôme flash bronzer mousse. I used the later on my wedding day as it gives me just a soft glow when used only once. I then topped up with summer glow on honeymoon (I don’t tan by the way, I have über pale Celtic skin) and voila I came back looking like I had actually spent two weeks away.
I have always loved fake tan, I even like the biscuity smell ( does this make me weird?). When I use it I feel more confident and slightly slimmer, it just makes me feel better.
I have had 2 really bad experiences though, both with spray tans one home done the other salon. The first one gave be a really lovely all over colour but feet that looked like David Dickenson. The other was a St Tropez I had done as a test for my wedding ( it was also two days before my hen). I was reliably informed I would only go the colour I naturally tan (fine as I don’t). But… after sitting for however many hours developing, I washed it off to reveal a colour that can only be described as TOWIE mahogany. It looked natural, just very very dark. Not me at all, suffice to say I cancelled the wedding appointment.
I don’t want to put people off though, my friend went to the same salon and had the same tan done and she came out all glowy (she is the same skin tone as me). So I really think a test is a good idea as people can vary so much.
Xx
@Charlotte – gravy…my nana used to say to my dad that fake tan was only like when they covered their legs in Bisto during the war because they couldn’t get their hands on tan tights!
@Mel and Lynsey – I’m with you, pale and fascinating all the way! Nicola Roberts became my hero when she swore off the fake tan. I’m so pale that I’ve never actually tanned naturally in my life, I just go from white to scarlet and back again – which is something to explain to the impertinent scamps who say to me ‘why don’t you just do a few minutes on a sunbed?’ OR, I could do a few minutes in a microwave, it would probably have the same effect!
I am wondering about this MAC body foundation for the big day though, because I can look a bit lilac in photos (plus one of my bridesmaids is a St Tropez addict!) – can anyone tell me more please?xx
Omg fake tan is my forte! Although I am having a professional spray tan for W-day I am so excited to tell you girls about the biggest tanning secret in the industry, haha well I like to think so. (I use this for nights out, or just keeping my tan up generally)
Basically I was always obsessed with St Tropez, it gives a lovely even tan and a beautiful colour, but at about £24+ a bottle was just getting too expensive to keep up my tan all the time. Then I discovered St Moriz! It’s actually amazing its like £3 a bottle- both the spray and the mousse are really good and it works EXACTLY like St Tropez. Savers and Morissons and I think now even Wilkinsons sell it. After about 10 years perfecting my tanning regime I have some top tips that never fail:
-Always exfoliate first and then rub a little moisturiser onto underarms, elbows, knees, heels and ankles.
- If using a spray make sure you stand on a mat/towel to prevent getting orange feet
- Apply all over body using sparingly on knees and ankles and elbows.
-I apply to my face aswell and right back far into my hairline so there are no white bits
-Use a mitt to apply everywhere do NOT at any stage get it on the palms of your hands it will never come off!!
-Now the most important tip, when you have applied everywhere take the mitt off your hands and wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water. I even get some exfoliant and rub that on just incase I have any on my hands.
- Now put a tiny splodge of fake tan on the back of one hand and loads of moisturiser and then rub the backs of your hands together! Making sure you rub the tanning mixture in between each finger and all over the back of hand.
-Sleep in an old dressing gown to avoid ruining your bedding!
There you go girls, I hope my tips help and please try St Moriz, it’s amazing!!
xxxxxx
I had a spray tan done the day before an event and it still looked exactly the same: didn’t fade or anything. I got spray tanned on the Thursday and but it only started to fade around the Sunday: not bad for £40! They recommended not showering afterwards so I didn’t until right before going out on the Saturday.
It was a St Tropez one and I actually find having someone else do it very relaxing. No blotches, no streaks or anything either! I’ve noticed that when having them done prior to a holiday they last a little bit less though, presumably from the sea/pool.
x
I am loving all these tips!!! I haven’t tried faking it in years but you lot are inspiring a little bravery! plus i have a year to go so plenty of time to perfect it
I am pretty pale and never usually bother to do anything as I’m quite accepting of my shortcomings and as I’ve got older at least I do tan well (safely)! When I was younger though I do remember going to the hospital with my mum because she had cut her hand on a kitchen knife (and driven herself to the hospital with it wrapped in a towel – hardcore legend!) and because i looked pale the nurses got me a seat and made me sit down instead of her!!! impressed she was not!
When I was in my teens though I will confess my parents actually had a sunbed. Soooo very 1992! It was in our loft. Purple neon light came out of the skylight. The neighbours must have thought we had aliens visiting!!!!
What perfect timing this post is! I have a St Tropez spray tan booked for after work – this is the trial ahead of the real deal a week on Thurs….and then wedding 28/4! Less than 2 weeks and the main thing occupying my brain is skin!
I realise I have left my ‘trial’ until quite late…would very much appreciate any encouraging words along the lines of: the trial fake tan will definitely come off in time for the real one and I won’t be sporting tan on top of crumbly tan… eeek!
Fake tan is never something that I have assimilated into my beauty regime. It just feels like another expensive, time consuming thing to have to do in top of everything else (dying, conditioning, drying and straighening hair, cleansing, toning, moisturising, shaving legs, shaving elsewhere…yawnsville!) I am pretty pasty, but I think I am ok with that. A bit of bronzer on my face to make me look slightly less dead is about as far as I go. But I am worried about the skin on my arms looking uneven and bumpy on W-day…I have started using those exfoliating mittens and moisturise religiously…any other tips?
@Rosie, good luck! Exfoliate like mad and you should be ok, even if you have a bit of residual tan left your new one will cover it up. Promise!
Xx
I have just returned from work to this and laughed my tan lined ass off at all your comments.
@Charlotte – ‘pornstar’ t-shirt… Erotica performance… Really? And your Dad’s band is called the Blow Jobs? What kind of sexy performing family do you come from!?
@Pamela – I need to hear more about the purpose of this fake tan poncho… I don’t understand!
@Princess Bride – I haven’t tried St Mortiz but my little sister swears by it (she’s only 15!).
What age did you lot start fake tanning?
@Naomi Liddell – I agree! @Pamela I want to understand the poncho purpose! is it huge? are you nakey underneath? sounds risky!!!!
Hi Ladies,
I used to try FakeBake but it never worked for me? All my mates used it too and they all looked gorgeous but when I tried (And trust me I used to lather it on) I never changed even a shade? So gave up with that, moved on to Johnsons holiday skin, it stank and sent me yellow but I did find using it while on holiday and afterwards when I already had a base colour it works really well. I am shameful to say I then moved on to sunbeds and loved them for a while (I was young and dumb!) but have stopped that now so am back to being casper white and not knowing where to go? I have had spray tan’s in the past when being bridesmaid and for hen’s etc but I always felt I looked kind of dirty? I think because I am so fair and pale skinned I just went for too dark a colour? My legs are practically see through so any tips would be greatly received. I am liking the sound of the Dove one, is it the same as Johnsons? more a tinted moisturiser or is it in an actual fake tan?
xxx
@Naomi Liddell and @Miss Vix…the logic behind the fake tan poncho is thus…
It is indeed huge and fairly roomy, meaning that one can go totally braless and not worry about any nipple-age being seen by random builders as you run from the salon to your car…
It is also incredibly comfy and I tend to tan before a BIG night out with the girls…therefore the night before I like to be all relaxed in my pj bottoms and the fake tan poncho on the sofa with the Big C and a packet of Chewits…preferably watching some kind of trash TV…along the lines of Keeping up with the Kardashians, The City, The Hills, Gossip Girl…
The irony of the poncho is that these days it is not at all sexy but it it’s heyday it had that comfy, ugg boot, I’m a nice girl to chill out with chic about it…and I was indeed wearing it when me and the Big C had our first ‘let’s stay in date’ which we all know really means ‘let’s have sex’ date…
He know looks at it a misses those days…HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! The poncho no longer means sex. It means tan, chewits and Kim Kardashian!
xoxo
aaah all is clear!! (although now i want chewits!)
Mmmmmm, chewits!
@Lou just go along to your nearest Mac counter and have a look try it out on the back of your hand, then apply another layer and just see the difference, I’m not sure if they go lighter than a C2 (which is what I wear and use on all my pale brides) but it blends effortlessly and photographs really well! I adore the stuff and need to buy more but they don’t ‘do’ it in Hong Kong, gah!
Ps. @Pamela – i am MASSIVELY craving chewits now x
I have a bit of a phobia of orange skin – I’m pale and I like it. But I do put a little fake tan on my legs in the summer because they’re SO pale – usually St Tropex with a mitt and I still have dodgy smears round my ankles and the back of my calves.
I tried the Johnson’s gradual tanner stuff when everyone went mad for it: I looked like an orange zebra. Lest there be any confusion, it was not attractive. Even to zebras.
I’m pretty sure I’ll want to be porcelain pale for the wedding (esp as it’s in November) but I’ve just been told that the best cure for blobby arms is a bit of fake tan so I’m wondering whether to try it. The thing is I definitely don’t want a tanned decollete and I can’t imagine how you can have both without looking like you have American Tan tights on your arms…
I’m pale and potentially interesting? english rose complextion on a good day/when I’m well rested, eaten well etc, bit pale when I’ve been burning the candle.
In the summer, if i’ve got my stumpy pegs out, I will put the tinest bit of bronze on my legs but thats it… I’ll sunbathe on holiday etc.. but generally just go a little bit golden with some freckles
So no fake tan for wedding… its funny actually as most people do ask ‘Are you having a spray tan?’
Why oh why would I try that for the first time on my wedding day… that would be silly!
Plus Mike is a white & red face celtic boy (a red heads skin I call it…) … he doesnt tan (or do the heat very well – honeymoon in Greenland?!?)
@pamela I want a tan poncho! Just to say I own one and to freak out my h2b! Also think your dad would like my dad…. He finds it hilarious to give me a run down of what is wrong with my outfit. His favourite talking point of the moment is my love of sheer tops. Its not that he doesn’t approve, he just finds them REALLY funny.
He also sent me a lovely poem a few years back when I was heart broken. It basically makes me weep and laugh even now as he couldn’t resist some fashion digs in with the cutesy stuff.
Fake tan – love it and getting better at it! I am having a spray one done but having it on the thursday before the saturday just in case i need to exfoliate like crazy or top up!
I also like st moritz! Cheap and cheerful, but I’ve never used it regularly, just once off. The build up stuff is awesome too.
I want some of the MAC face and body stuff! Must get to the MAC shop, I do love it there. My bank balance does not.
@Peridot – DITTO DITTO DITTO – I tried Johnsons thinking it would just tan me slightly and then ended up on a few occassions looking like Orange Zebra
@Pamela – you are hilarious… always.
I like the No7 range gradual tanner, which I just use like moisturiser. It doesn’t streak and you don’t need to exfoliate, and it doesn’t turn you orange. I have fairly naturally tanned skin in any case so I don’t need to much.
I tried the Johnson one once and it didn’t work – just sat on top of my skin before rolling into little ball things that had to be washed off. Weird.
I love being tanned! I like to tell myself I’m half a stone lighter when I’m bronzed, it does make you feel like that right? Or is that just me??
…………..I’m just hoping I don’t get any unwanted strap marks in the wrong places!
I started my affair with fake tan about 10 years ago, eek! And then ashamedly I did use sunbeds for awhile…….and did get addicted to the all year round glow that going every other week gave me. Then, like Naomi, I decided to go fake tan cold turkey! I stopped going and tried to become acquainted with my naturally pale self. I have done it and now only fake tan, for ‘special occasions’ and going out.
I tried the Johnson’s day stuff too, didn’t like it, got lots of build up. After trying a few, my tan best buddy is good old No7 from Boots, wear off, dark/medium lotion. You can see where you’re putting it and I always get a good coverage with it, the smell alas, could be improved.
My top tip for tanning would be…..
I put vaseline on my knuckles and inbetween my fingers before I put gloves on. While you’re tanning, it sinks in and by the time you take the gloves off to tan the back of your hands, a little blob of tan rubbed over, will do enough to blend with your arms but not give you orange hands.
Another tan I’ve found to be very good and I buy when feeling a bit more flush is HeShe. Applied with a mitt, it gives a lovely finish.
For wedding day, the hen do is in Spain a couple of weeks before, I’m hoping I’ll get a glow and my nose freckles with appear, I love a freckle!
Yo Yo Yo!
I have never tried fake bake as I have heard nightmare stories about brown/orange bedsheets – Malc would kill me if I got tan on our sparkly white bed sheets!!
I think I will stick to what I know – I don’t think I’m brave enough to try out a spray tan as I usually end up in an itchy/blotchy mess – attractive hey!
It’s the perfect opportunity to try out my normal tan this weekend as I’m tryng my dress on and ordering it this Saturday eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkk!!
Another item ticked off the list
Vix
x
I used to be a bit of a tan fanatic, but I just don’t have time now I have a small baby to run around after!
I remember being forever conscious of ‘the smell’ (the ones that say they don’t smell of biscuits, they lie), and how it comes off on your bedclothes. I would have SIX bottom sheets on my bed just to avoid staining the mattress!
Sublime Bronze was my tan of choice. I did start off with St Tropez, rubbed on by a slave at a beauty salon, but doing the ‘walk of shame’ afterwards back to your car whilst looking like you’ve rolled in dogmuck was something I soon realised wasn’t for me!
@Belinda – I never had the for thought to use extra bedsheets…………..our mattress, to the H2B’s despair is one half Orange! Woops!
I have been told from various other brides that they were strictly advised not to do fake tan/spray tan as it could rub off on the dress especailly under the arms where depsite us being ladies we could sweat a little with all the excitement of the day. I definitely wanted to be a little tanned but I was going to be ‘bad’ and do a few sunbeds as I thought i only get married once. What would be best fake tan or spray? Has anyone experienced this rub off on the dress??!! I am a little nervous to risk it, orange stains on a white dress, under the arms is not a good look!
@Gem – soooooo get on the tan poncho band wagon…I would say that after my wedding dress, and my pastel green Anna Sui dress it is my favourite item of clothing.
Tan….you either love it or hate it, a bit like marmite. Some of them smell like it too…blergh!
I have had a professional tan done numerous times & i have to say it is the most natural, non-orange, golden glow tan i ever had. I had two weddings one week after the other last year so i paid £22 for the professional salon tan on the Wednesday, Wedding on the Friday, topped up tan with daily tan moisturiser and was still good to go the following Saturday. Exfoliation & moisturising is the key to preparation & after care.
I am booked in to get a professional tan done by the lovely Kirsty 2 days before my wedding, along with mani, pedi then she will be doing my fresh & gorgeous make-up on the day. just a light glow is all i need. If you do tan day before it will come off on your dress….no bride wants that!
Surprisingly being blonde with blue eyes & a touch of freckles i go brown when abroad, so when we leave straight away after the wedding for ten days of love, laughter & loungers in Sorrento we will be arriving back to another wedding reception the following week. I hopefully will be glowing with a safe & natural tan!
This tanning malarky is a whole lotta work!
I am just still laughing at the illustration of us – we are so freakin’ orange!!!
@Lynsey R – what kind of professional tan do you have pet?
Charlotte xxx
@charlotte i get the spray tan done at a local beauty place. i think it was sienna x tan she used. just me, plastic shower cap, black knickers & my dignity left at the door! Not sure what make of tan kirsty will be using to spray me. I have used Body Bronzing at home before & thought it gave a nice light tan with just one application. x
*body bronzing mousse
http://www.bodybronzing.co.uk/home.php
me…again. When i say spray, it is with the air spray gun/thingy in a spray room/booth. they get all the areas you can’t always reach yourself and as it is a spray system it dries really quick.
I have to admit I’m a bit of fake-tan-aholic so am loving this discussion!
The poncho sounds great haha!
Never had a professional spray but would def love to try it.
I always use a glove as it’s the only way I can get even coverage. And I find fake tan always dries my hands out so I use a moisturising one for my hands.
Never realised how much there was to talk about when it comes to fake tan….
The only time I had a spray tan it was so patchy that I looked skewbald. Particularly nice touch were the dark patches on my fingers (WHY?) which made it looked as if I had been mainlining nicotine since birth.
Well after all this chat i ran straight out yesterday and bought the Dove Summer Glow – it really IS so much better than the Johnsons one! A lot less sticky and a lot less stinky!
LOVE this post!!!!! H2B used to complain all the time… ‘what’s that grubby mark on your arm’ or ‘I can’t snuggle up to you when you smell like that’…however I think he has finally accepted – love me, love my tan!!!
Pale and interesting all the way for me! I think I’m in the minority. I always wear sun screen (pale skins are more susceptible to skin cancer, my Doctor told me) and I am very happy to be pale. I would look ridiculous if I faked it, I don’t think my colouring would suit it at all. I have dark hair and v pale skin, so I guess I’m probably rocking the ethereal look. Suits me