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Paddy & Debs: What We’ve Learnt About Wedding Planning

This month I thought I’d do a round-up, which I’ve catchily titled ‘What we’ve learnt about wedding planning and stuff…’

I guess the biggest thing we’ve learnt is that it’s your day and you can go as big or small and intimate as you want. That’s not news to any of you, but it’s pretty hard to stick to. Just because people expect certain traditional elements that doesn’t mean you have to do them, and if initially you think that you don’t want something, then change your mind that’s fine too. This goes for every part of the wedding, the hens and stags, themes and the venue as well. If it isn’t offering what you want, don’t be afraid to tweak things or just find somewhere else – pick up the phone and have a conversation with someone about trying something different; you never know, it might be the push that they are looking for. You’ve got to be happy with where you will be celebrating what is potentially, the most important and biggest day of your life. Hopefully you’ll only be doing it once so it’s got to be right.

You can argue, and I would, that the ‘if it’s not right, change it’ principle applies to everything to do with the wedding. We’ve changed caterers, boys outfits and subsequently the colour scheme of the day, Debs’ dress, stationery, decor and just about everything else at least once. Our ideas evolved, the initial enthusiasm for pinning everything gorgeous diminished with the reality that having jobs and social lives too (and maintaining these) was equally as important as making sure that our wedding day is as much ‘ours’ as possible. So for those of you who saw our original mood board, you’ll see from our updated one that there are some amends…hopefully it’ll all come together and look as nice as the updated inspiration board.

Realistically, we couldn’t take a few weeks off to make, fold, build and grow everything that we wanted but we’ve found ways around that and focussed on the parts of the day that we can make really personal without spending weeks on end making everything from scratch. Originally we thought that we’d do that, and enjoy the process, but in reality we’ve decided to spend that time with friends and family, and picked up a few extra shifts at work to pay for a few extras too.

At this point I would like to thank all our suppliers for their time, patience, ideas and for understanding when we tweak things. We (Debs really) have got good working relationships with all of them, which has made planning so much easier. We’ve taken a couple of risks, and balanced that with some guaranteed awesome and established wedding industry gold suppliers so we’re excited to see how it all comes together.

Personally what I’ve learnt from this whole experience is that planning a wedding is a team sport. I’ll be the first to hold up my hands and recognise that there have been times when I haven’t pulled my weight and done the little jobs that Debs has given me, and I just count my lucky stars that Debs manages to see past my laid back (sometimes horizontal) attitude.

We still have a few things still left to do including booking a honeymoon, finding accommodation for the dogs, picking up Debs’ dress and choosing her shoes, the dreaded seating plan (any tips would be gratefully received), choosing the order of service and readings and a few other bits and bobs. Luckily the niggly worries about dressing the venue, table decorations, signage, bar, staffing etc have all been scooped up by Hafod which has put our minds at ease. Thanks Joanne!

We’re delighted that Joanne has offered to help us dress the venue, she’s got a great eye and we’re sure that she’ll make it much prettier than we could have done on our own. Taking inspiration from pinterest (again!) and some of the weddings which have already been there and from RMW features is a great start and we’re excited to see how it all comes together. We know that this wouldn’t be everyones cup of tea, passing over the décor to someone else, but really for us it’s great. We can be involved but not worried about it, and it’ll be a surprise when we all arrive.

So, with five weeks to go I guess all that’s left to do is say a massive thank you to the RMW team for putting up with us and thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and comment on our blog posts.

The next time you’ll see our faces we’ll be Mr and Mrs Mahon!

As always much love,

Paddy and Debs

Author: Fern Godfrey
Fern spends most of her time dreaming about weddings and trying to convince her long-suffering boyfriend to propose. Lucky enough to live in sunny Cornwall, if you need her – you’ll find her at beach.

22 thoughts on “Paddy & Debs: What We’ve Learnt About Wedding Planning

  1. Great advice guys, thank you! All the best for your big day 😀

    Can I just ask where those gorgeous little heart stilettos are from?! X

  2. 36 days?!! Is that all? But I haven’t decided what I’m wearing yet!

    Oh Debs and Paddy, so much has happened and lots has changed since you started planning but you’re dead right. As long as you’re a team then everything works out fabulous in the end!

    And please… If you need ANY help in the next month, you know where I am.

    Love you both loads. xxx

    1. Just move to Wales and finish all the planning now, you’ve had your fun in Liverpool but it’s time to sort all this out 😉

      If our day is half as gorgeous as yours then I’ll be a happy girl. <3

  3. Hey!! I got married back in April and can honestly say the seating plan isn’t as bad as you think!!! The main thing to decide is do you want to mix people up or not?! With our wedding I’m originally from Northern Ireland (where we held the wedding) and my groom and most of our friends are from the Isle of Man (where we live). As people weren’t likely to meet after the big day we didn’t bother mixing people up preferring to let people catch up with family and friends they might not see often! Just remember that older people don’t want to be sat with your rowdy mates (we both play rugby for the same club so lots of rugby folk at our wedding who were put at one end of the room away from the delicate ears of grandparents etc!!) remember it’s your day and as long as you don’t put people who can’t stand each other on the same table you will be fine!! good luck! And make sure you enjoy every second of it – time flies and you want to remember every detail!! Xxxx

    1. That’s brilliant – hadn’t thought of it like that at all but that makes things much easier, thanks!

      No rugby types for us, but raft guides are not known for their quiet, low-key parties…

  4. Thank you for calming my nerves! We get married day before yourselves and have similar things to tick off our list! (Everyone keeps asking are you finished yet…no)! 5 weeks is still plenty of time….i hope!

    1. You’ve got plenty of time! Loads and loads… Do not panic!
      Prioritise; get the other half, a venue, rings if you want and you’re set. Everything that is meant to be will come together, and you’ll have the best first day of being married – and that’s a very lovely thing!

  5. Seating plan: me on one table, my children on another??

    Can’t wait to see it all guys, this is going to be emotional and beautiful and just a little bit magic. ❤️❤️❤️

    Same offer as Karen made too – anything you need, we are here xxx

  6. What a lovely round-up, I love that you came away with the same feeling we did that as long as we’re doing it together – we’ll love it!
    When I was panicking in the last few weeks my bridesmaid told me that as long as we both turn up and get married “everything else is just glitter” and it was the best thing anyone could have told me!
    On the seating plan front, we wrote everyone’s name on a little post-it and mapped the tables on big post-its over a wall in the house. We added every post-it to a table and then reviewed each one (the post-its mean you can move them easily if you need to) and then we went to sleep, we checked it the following day that we couldn’t see any issues and then we sent it to the venue. DONE. Good luck with the plan and wish you all the luck and happiness possible for your day and future xx

    1. I love that, ‘everything else is just glitter’ … can I steal it as my affirmation for the next five weeks?

      Thanks for the luck!

  7. The last few weeks are so exciting as you finally get to see all your hard work coming together. I’m really looking forward to seeing your beautiful wedding photos on RMW soon!

    For the table plan, we did the same as KateC and used mini post-it notes which we stuck to circles (to represent the tables, obviously!). I actually think that was the hardest part of the planning as just when you think you’ve nailed it, you realise Great Aunt Joan’s post-it note is stuck to your foot/dog’s foot (why do they love walking all over stuff you’re looking at?!) and then you have to start over again.

    To ensure certain guests had a ‘prime seating position’ i.e. facing the top table rather than their back turned to it, we numbered the seating positions on each circle/table 1-10 and then assigned a number to each guest. That way, the venue knew exactly where to put the place cards (in case any post-its fell off) and it made sure Granny didn’t have to twist around, potentially cricking her neck, for the speeches.

    Wishing you and Debs lots of luck for 28th August and a very happy future together.

    1. That is a genius idea! Thanks Naomi.

      I usually have a healthy stock of post it notes so will absolutely be using them for this. I guess now we just have to place the people who RSVPd on time in the best possible positions and tell the latecomers that they’ll have to cwtch up together on a hay bale…

      Thanks very much for your lovely comment!

  8. Ahhh debs and paddy! Loved reading the last post! I agree that table planning hasn’t been that bad..and also the lady who has been fitting my dress said ‘don’t bother running it past anyone else, it’s your wedding, you know the guests, you know what will work’ and so we have done that! We’ve sort of mixed up friends and family, but not to the point where it’s completely divided.
    I hope you guys have an amazing wedding, can’t wait to see some pics! X

  9. Good luck with your last minute preparations! The final weeks fly by so enjoy every second! We were married 5 weeks ago and were lucky enough to have the awesome Penn and Paper dream team capturing the big day and believe me you are in VERY safe hands…people have not stopped commenting about how amazing the pictures look and we were blown away by our teaser trailer from the guys at Papertwin! You’re going to have the best day ever and are guaranteed some fantastic shots to keep forever alongside your memories! Have lots of fun, relax and enjoy the build up! xx

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