I have never been what you could call small. I come from a long line of tall women, my Mum was some sort of beautiful blonde Amazonian who turned heads wherever she went. In school I was always the tallest, until the boys caught up with me that is! I have generally always been ‘the big girl’ of the group, and yes at times this bothers me, and after ballooning to a size 18 after my 21st birthday I vowed I would never ever let myself get to that size again. So I lost over 3 stone and enjoyed being a nice slim size 12 for a few years!
So you’d think once the engagement ring was on my finger, I would drop a few stone in preparation for the wedding. I’m still waiting for it to drop off me! 12 weeks to go until the wedding day people! I wake up in the morning and look over my shoulder at my backside and the ‘junk’ is still most definitely in my ‘trunk’. Mr O has managed to get rid of his puppy fat, and is looking rather muscley and svelte. Which only emphasizes the fact that I haven’t managed to shift any weight. Bah. Not good. The added pressure of being the bride automatically means that people expect me to all of a sudden drop a ton of weight and become some sort of uber slim vision in ivory, as if it’s some sort of crime to walk down the aisle in a size 14 wedding dress.
I hear and read stories of brides losing weight, and looking fabulous because of it, so why on earth have I not managed it yet? And I may be paranoid but I’m sure I’ve copped a few looks of ‘hmmm she’s gonna be one of those big brides’. Perhaps it’s just me and my insecurities, it probably is just me being paranoid, ordinarily I couldn’t give a tiny rats arse about what people think, I’m me, genetically I will never be a size 8 (unless I’m dying of starvation), so don’t judge me society, if I want to tuck into a nice pot of houmus with some pitta and wine I will god dammit! My Mum always taught me to love myself, and my food.
My other pet peeve, (and girls those of you who have ever battled with your weight will understand this) is when slim girls, who have never ever experienced having a fat arse, or bingo wings, complain they resemble a heffa yet give you tips and advice on how to lose weight, what to eat, and what exercise to do! Thanks for that! I am what I am, I could do 3 hours of exercise a day and live on spinach leaves and be a size 10 but what will happen after the wedding? I will drink wine, tuck into some houmus and pitta and bam! Back come the curves. It’s just not realistic. And I want to look like me on my wedding day, not some starved miserable version of me. The last time I was stressed and dropped some weight people told me I didn’t look myself, and that I looked unwell. So if that’s anything to go by pass me the vino and olives please!
I’m happy with the way I look, I’ve accepted who I am and I exercise and eat healthily, this post isn’t me digging for compliments from you all either I promise – yes I would love to try life as a size 8 but right now I can’t be bothered I have far more important things to get on with! Something a little more achievable like half a stone is within my sights though. I’m not daft I want to try and look my best on my wedding day, I guess my weight has always been a bit of a sore spot.
And I don’t have any interesting or relevant photo’s to support my post this week, so here’s another picture of my cute little chunky cat ‘Miss Molly’, and a lovely image taken from my birthday celebration last weekend – my favourite Vivien of Holloway Dress!
Another waiting issue is the invitations…. We eventually got to a point where we could agree a final proof, and Kristy Rice’s team are currently beavering away for us to get them shipped over so we can get them out to our guests! I had hoped to have them in the post by now, did I mention it’s 12 weeks til the wedding? Everyone else I know who’s marrying in September has theirs out and the RSVP’s are flooding in, which makes me feel as though I should have pulled my finger out a little sooner! I’m trying my hardest not to have a cow about that. Mr O keeps telling me it will all be ok.
And finally, after seeing how easy Gok Wan made it on tv last week, I attempted to create my very own birdcage veil. It was beyond easy, if I can do it anyone can! I found a few online tutorials but to be honest, it’s quite simple and once you get ‘hands on’ it soon becomes clear what needs to go where. I wasn’t sure whether to do a tutorial on the subject, seeing as I have decided not to wear it after all, but I’ve included some photos for you to see, and please excuse the dodgy self take! The netting was from John Lewis and cost me about £2.00. The diamante hair comb was bought from www.nieve-couture.com and comes as a set of three, although you can pick up a plastic hair comb from the haberdashery for about £3.00!
I have a little secret with regards to the dress… all will be revealed soon. I can’t wait and I am pretty useless at keeping things quiet but I think you’ll all be pleased with my decision.
Yours creatively craving houmus and wine,