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What Stef Did… Final Touches & Final Thoughts

Oh my days! I am saying hello to you for the last time as a bride to be! So HELLO!!! Jackie is getting married at the weekend and then I am next! Where on earth has the time gone?! People always tell you it flies past but I kept thinking that it was still ages until I got to marry Ciaran. But that time has flown by and on TWO weeks on Saturday I will become a wife; he will become a husband; I will be his and he will be mine. Oh it is just all getting too much!!

Any way amongst the all the shock that it really is that close and it really is happening we have also been celebrating! On Sunday we attended Ciaran’s Grandparents Diamond wedding anniversary party. 60 years! That is impressive and congratulations to them and I look forward to our 60 years together. Amidst the party they were interviewed by several local papers and during one of the wee ‘photoshoots’ Ciaran decided that after 60 years they could still enjoy a first and took Charlie and Doreen’s First ever selfie! So here it is with us and Ciaran’s sister Devon.

01

The Great Hen Adventure

The last time I wrote on these fabulous pages I was packing up for my hen weekend and wow what fun that was! I felt under a lot of pressure, organising it myself, that everyone had a great time. Especially as I wasn’t sure what everyone was going to expect as a drunken night out on the town with tacky accessorise just isn’t for me.

Instead we hired Drumblair House with the hope of a Downton vibe, to stay in from the Friday through the Monday and it did not disappoint! I arrived first with a few of the girls (after a little detour round the Scottish countryside) and we were shown round by the house keeper and man, the place is a maze! It holds an impressive grand lounge and a snug, and a huge country kitchen diner, we all learned very quickly how to cook on an AGA which was fun. But the upstairs was amazing; bedrooms led on to bedrooms which led on to bathrooms and further bedrooms; I could see how this could be the perfect family country retreat for a massive family!

02

We enjoyed an afternoon of crafting led by the lovely ladies of the Huntly Crafters. We made garters and memory books and had a great laugh! It was lovely to see how well all my different friends got on and mixed together even if they had never met before. Rosemary from the Huntly Crafter helped them to make me a surprise heart shaped notice/photo board which is lovely and I can’t wait to put up in our new flat! We then had a massive dinner party with massive roast and cocktails. The girls surprised me with goodie bags for everyone and decorations followed by games and much laughter! The following day was chilled and we went for a walk in the countryside before saying goodbye to some of the lovely ladies and having a girlie night with token nail painting and facemasks. It was such a lovely weekend and I think Hen parties should be a reoccurring, maybe annual, event!

03

Final touches

Very last minute we have decided to do a lot of DIY. We are now doing most of the flowers ourselves and have bought an awful lot of tulips from wholesalers, which we are going to use to make the bridesmaids bouquets and decorate the church and then hopefully take it all with us to Glen Tanar. A tip I have learnt is listen to the pro: I was quite insistent I wanted this pretty purple flower to make my arrangements and it took some convincing before I conceded the flowers smell may outweigh their pretty if they smelt of pee(!!). However I easily conceded that I need a florist to create my bouquet and an ever lengthening list of buttonholes for the gentlemen. I have also set my Dad and Ciaran on the task of some joinery to make some RMW inspired props and decoration. The next thing on my list is the favours which we are opting to do but not waste too much time and energy on and with hopefully we using a family recipe to leave a little treat for every guest.

04

Final thoughts

Over my time of wedding planning a few things have struck me; one being the fact you can do whatever you like but don’t get hung up on being unique as most stuff has been done before but not witnessed by your guest! Another has been the banning of guest photography during wedding or an ‘unplugged wedding’ as it has become known and it has got me thinking. A wedding I once attended had a notice to avoid taking photos during the ceremony and I didn’t think much of it but people ignored it anyway. It has only been since I have been thinking about my own wedding and my own photos that I have thought about it more seriously. There are blog posts all over the place about it: here is one.

05

The main argument for an unplugged ceremony/wedding is that a well-meaning guest trying to capture the same shot can ruin the work the professional, who is being paid to capture it, by blocking their view point or with their flash or ‘red dot of doom’. Guest photography can be important to capture angles that the professional cannot cover all at once and if the guest enjoys taking pictures then let them do so, but the pro would probably have produced a better shot than the guest who just walked in from of her/him. Guests can become professional photo bombers!

A secondary argument is that the pro is getting paid to do it, it’s their job. It is the guest job however to enjoy the day and be part of it, not be a slave to technology. Just because we can Instagram the day so easily does not mean we have to spend the day doing so. Guest can find themselves so busy looking through their lenses that they miss the wedding itself. I would much rather enjoy witnessing and being a part of two people committing themselves to each other for life rather than tirelessly trying to capture it on film.

06

Another issue is that if guests are taking photos they are most likely covering their own faces in the profession photos and I would much rather have the photos of my family and loved ones that I am paying for, than that of 100 different camera lenses. Plus the idea of walking down the aisle is terrifying me enough as it is. That is a lot of pressure for little old me to deal with. I mean it would be bad enough if I tripped and stumbled but can you imagine if there were 100 people documenting it! And even if I managed to get down the aisle safely I am no Jennifer Lawrence who can deal with the several dozen photographers following her around. I do not have the confidence for that!

What do you think? Would you put in place a photo embargo? Or are you happy to let your guest roam freely? Personally I think I am going to give a gentle encouragement to be in the moment and enjoy our wedding ceremony but I am not going to be mad if people take a few photos. The one thing I will never understand is why everyone takes pictures of the couple signing the schedule? I mean they don’t frame that shot and hang it on their wall do they?

Final goodbyes

Anyway this is me signing off on my last post as a bride to be and I just want to say I have loved sharing all my crazy with you all over the past year and I hope you have enjoyed reading and have perhaps even found it useful. My main advice would be to sit down and write a list of things you think a wedding needs; the cut it down to what you’re wedding wants adding in a few personal preferences and then priorities your list. Know that if you want an accurate life size cake version of yourselves then maybe you can’t afford that world famous photographer. Or if you want to DIY everything maybe you can’t weave everyone a personalised napkin and blanket. But also if you don’t do any of these things during planning (like us) know that it will be amazing nonetheless.

07

Unlike Jackie we are that traditional couple; we haven’t lived together; we are keeping a close eye on our John Lewis gift list to see whether we will get any cutlery to eat food off our pretty new plates with and boiled down our wedding is pretty traditional and standard but it will be ours! Whatever your wedding consists of know it will be awesome. I know that in 16 days’ time I will have a husband and can start my life with Ciaran and that is all I ever wanted. The gorgeous dress, hair and makeup; the delicious food and cracking ceilidh along with all our little details are but a celebration of our marriage and an amazing bonus.

With all my unmarried love,

Stef
x x x

Author: Adam Crohill
Adam likes Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain.

15 thoughts on “What Stef Did… Final Touches & Final Thoughts

  1. 16 days, Stef! S-i-x-t-e-e-n! Wedding-date-twin high five!!

    Thanks so much for sharing your journey with us, can’t wait to hear all about your amazing day. You and Ciaran have put so much thought into it I just know it’s going to be fabulous.

    Jen xx

    1. High five of excitement and terror! I swear I have never felt so many different emotions at once as I do now!

      It has been a pleasure and I cannot wait to hear how your day goes as it happen simultaneously with mine!!! Eeeeeeee!

  2. Ahhh Stef!!! Lump in my throat honey! I can’t believe that it is all finally starting to happen! And that last photo – soooo gorgeous!

    What an amazing achievement by Ciaran’s grandparents – 60 years is truly incredible! And how lovely that in the year they celebrate such a huge milestone, they are also able to celebrate the marriage of their grandson.

    You’ve put soooo much effort into this wedding Stef, that I know it’s going to be amazing. It will be such a special day for you and Ciaran and I have huge admiration for the traditions you have followed leading up to the wedding. That’s not something many people can claim to these days!

    Keep us updated in the next couple of weeks lovely. We’re right there behind you, supporting you right up to the big day. xxxxxx

  3. I will need all your support to keep me sane in the next 16 days!

    I know! Sixty years!!

    I really just can’t wait for the day to come and have the best time with all my friends and family!!
    x x x

  4. Awwwww Stef can’t believe your big day is nearly here!!!!!
    Hope you guys have an amazing day, I will be eagerly watching the ‘book of face’ for some sneaky peeks!

    Enjoy every second lovely 🙂 xxx

  5. Hilarious personalised blanket/napkin shout there for Philippa! They were up there in the all time greatest wedding DIY list. I completely treasure ours and at some point will get round to making cushions out of them!

    That selfie is too cute. Who needs Bradley Cooper?? Best of luck for your big day Stef, it’s going to be beautiful xxx

    1. Ha! Yes – I would say that hand-crafting 90 personalised blankets and napkins is not for the faint hearted, but they certainly proved popular.

      I’m stepping out of self-imposed exile of all-things-wedding to wish you the happiest day ever and a long and happy marriage, Stef. It’ll be a blast xx

  6. I have already decided that I don’t want guests taking pictures during my ceremony. I feel self-conscious having my picture taken and am going to be nervous enough walking down the aisle! I want to see faces not phones! Realistically the guest photos of this part are nothing special and that is why I’m paying a lot of money for a professional! Not sure how to spread the word about this, may just have the ushers do it rather than make a big announcement.

    Best of luck for the big day Stef!

    1. Exactly! You want their faces not their phones eternally captured by the professionals. I too will be a self conscious enough as it is with out all the added pressure of all the cameras.
      Some people put it on their website if they have one, others on the orders of services. We will have projectors in our church so I am thinking a wee cheeky slide whilst guests are gathering before I make my entrance!

      All the best to you, my dear!
      x x x

  7. Stef, it really isnt long now…whoop whoop!! You are going to have the best day of your life. It looks like you had a fab hen doo, high fives to your girls and you obvs

  8. I dont know what happend there!!?? Bloody phone!! Ciarans grandparents sound amazing and what a year to celebrate, it really is going to be epic. You have worked so hard achieving everything you wanted to make your day Yours and ciarans which I think is wonderful. I cant wait to hear what you have planned for the lead up to the big day. I have loved being part of your journey and want to thabk you for bringing us girls together. Well done again hun, another hab read xx

  9. I can’t believe I’m going to miss it, I hope you enjoy every moment and I can’t wait to see the pictures xxx

  10. Great post Stef, good luck for the big day.
    Really enjoyed reading about the photography aspect of the wedding, some real valid points which I’d never thought about before.

    Looking forward to hearing all about your wedding day! 😀 x

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