Do you keep it a secret that you met him on-line?
…About 6 or 7 years ago, (pre Mr O) I embarked on a little ‘online adventure’. How it came about? I met a guy, in a bar, who was a little out of my league (or so I thought), who then opened up to tell me that he was 38, sick of being messed around and just wanted to find his true love.
A little odd hearing that come from a man, when in my experience all men wanted was to play games and be annoying tw*ts. A little off putting too, for someone who at the time was in her early twenties, and really not looking for anything too serious. He then admitted to being on an online dating site, at which I judged him as being a bit of a desperate nut-job and never spoke to him again!
Yes I know, what a judgmental cow. I chastised myself for being so awful and judgmental about him, he was a genuinely nice guy, he was good looking (at least an 8 out of 10) and had alot going for him who am I to say that he was a desperate nut-job, just because he was going out to get what he wanted in life? If anything that made him quite appealing to me, his open view on life and his go get’em attitude was all the more endearing. The fact that he was, as I said, at least an ’8′, made me feel a little baffled as to why on earth a man like this couldn’t find himself someone suitable in real life (as apposed to online).
So I looked on the dating site, browsing profiles, laughing (alot) at some who’s personalities really did bounce off the page. I checked out the competition in my area too, recognised a few local faces, and so I secretly joined up, hiding my man browsing from my housemates for fear of jibes and much rib poking.
I made my profile as mysterious and aloof sounding as possible – none of this ’24, seeks like minded with a gsoh’ clap trap, I spoke of how I loved cheese, and laughter, and watching Spaced dvds. Surprisingly I received a few nods in my direction from some matches. I wasn’t expecting anything to happen really – I was new to this game, the whole notion of meeting people online was still very taboo back then. We didn’t yet have Myspace, or Facebook, people didn’t really know how to network on the dating site so it was a strange place to be.
There were the matches who clearly were only after one thing – didn’t meet up with any of those. I’m not that kind of girl.
There were the matches who I held a healthy email banter with, I met up with those.
There were the matches who clearly had stalker capabilities – nope didn’t meet them.
And there were the matches who were in their twilight years (no I wasn’t browsing ‘sugardaddie.com’)
The ones I met up with were all very nice, perhaps something may have developed if my heart had been in it, but I just enjoyed going out for drinks and meeting them, and learning new things. I had my world opened up to new music, new bands, new bars, new books, and I learnt a lot about myself. There was never any danger involved, I generally took some friends along with me (once I had swallowed my pride and admitted what I was up to!), and so would the guy. It was never a ‘date’ scenario. I effectively made friends with them, and met them as I would meet any other male friend, and enjoyed a good night out. And that was that. I put the experience down to being character building, and that is what life is about!
I had some junk mail sent to me via datingdirect.com, who had clearly got my information from the free dating site, not sure why I did but I clicked on the link – to have a laugh at their suggested ‘matches’ I suppose.
I saw a face smiling off the page at me, and he was hot. We’re talking a ’10′ people. He was so absolutely gorgeous that I concluded he was actually a middle aged balding pervert, who had stolen this gorgeous-looking mans image and was using it to lure women in, for sexting and whatnot… It niggled away at me, and the only way I could view more photo’s was if I joined up. I always figured that actually paying for online dating services was a little… sad? The fact I had been doing it for free for the past year obviously meant I wasn’t in the slightest bit sad….!
I joined for three days only, the minimum time you could join – it was a ‘trial’. I viewed the gorgeous one’s profile, there were more photo’s. He was absolutely knee trembling gorgeous. Nothing remotely middle aged, balding, or perverted about him.
And this people, is how I met Mr O.
The rest, they say, is history.
We didn’t really tell anyone how we met, in fact most people just presumed we had met in a bar. We never bothered to put them straight. That whole taboo issue of online dating being pathetic bothered us a bit, and we didn’t want friends and family judging us, as I had judged the 38 Year Old Love Hunter.
We shared a few emails, shared numbers, spoke on the phone for a month and got to know each other, then we met up (alone this time), then we became close very quickly, we fell in love, we traveled, we moved in together, we got engaged, married, and had Baby O.
I went into our first date thinking that I would make a friend, which is wonderful, one can never have enough friends! I came away from the date with my stomach in knots. I liked him, reallllly like him. Hadn’t felt like this about anyone for a while. What made it worse was the fact that he was, and still is, a ten.
Lucky for me, in his eyes, I am a ten too.
So now whenever a friend has issues with men, my first response is ‘get yourself online!’, there is no shame in it, and when you have a success story like mine there is nothing to be ashamed of.
So ladies, do tell, did you meet yours on the world wide web?
Love,
Jenny x
