This is the fourth and final part of Jenny’s beautiful wedding day, with huge thanks to photographer Kim Hawkins and assistant Jon Mold for sharing the images.

Enjoy the gorgeousness lovelies!

The Father of the Bride

My brother, Rob, knocked me sideways with the amount of support he gave me on the day, and his speech was outstanding, nothing prepared me for how much thought and effort he had put into it. He even mentioned by name my lovely Emma who had travelled from Aus and one of the guests that let me down on the day, although he doesn’t know they let me down it angered so many people I thought it best not to mention it to him!
It wasn’t an easy task, giving me away, the pressure was on him to sort of conform to the ‘father of the bride’ roll and I know his two daughters (my youngest bridesmaids) were proud of him, and how lucky they are that when it’s their turn to marry their Dad is already well practised in the art of ‘giving away’! He’s always successful in anything he tries his hand to and so I had faith that his speech would deliver all the necessary info (too much info about me – I could have throttled my friends!) and then of course there was Mum. I knew he would mention Mum, because despite her ‘being there in spirit’ there was still a big gaping hole where she should have been.

During the getting ready process in the morning we only mentioned her to each other briefly, because we knew between Rob, Sarah, and I it would probably set us all off and the last thing we wanted was for painful tears to fall. It went without saying though that she was at the forefront of our minds all day, I for one never imagined getting married without her proud beautiful face waiting for me at the top of the aisle.

My brother was already a massive hit with Matts friends and family at the low key (low key my arse) stag night he held a few weeks before the wedding. In fact my big brother (who is old enough to know better) instigated drinking games and subsequently had to sleep with one foot on the floor just to stop the room spinning! I make him sound old don’t I, he’s only in his early forties but he’s a good time family man and I am so so proud of him I could gush about him for hours.

Learning a lot about me through my friends on the run up to the wedding, and knowing how much I love poetry, he included the following in his speech – there wasn’t a dry eye in the house;

“Every parent wants the best for their children, and wants them to be happy. I stand here now, on behalf of all our family, but particularly our Mum Sandra, immensely proud of Jenny, and what she has achieved, both today and with her life as a whole. To celebrate I’d like to read a short poem entitled “You are the mirror of my past” and I dedicate this from Mum to Jenny, and wish, as I know you do Jenny, that she could be here to read it to you herself;

You are the mirror of my past,
The future of my dreams,
The hope for what in life may last,
The jewel that time redeems.

And now that you’ve become a wife
With loves and passions new,
May you find in your sweet life
The joy I have in you.

It took every ounce of strength I could muster up within me to not lose control and sob like a child, but when he read this amazing poem I closed my eyes and tried to imagine my Mums voice. And it worked. It was like she was reading it to me, considering I haven’t heard her voice for so long now it surprised me that the memory came so easily, and I thought about the baby I am carrying and how much love I have for it already and it gave me strength. I swallowed the lump back and vowed that when I had a moment to myself to reflect on the day, I would re-read the poem and allow myself to weep.

All In The Details

When it came to knocking everyone bandy with quirky ideas and details, I decided to stick to my guns and not go for anything too ‘on trend’ and just stick with the basics. Good food, beautiful surroundings, great music and flowing booze. I’ll run through the list of suppliers we used because I can’t recommend them highly enough. We had to have live music, this was the best decision we made, the string quartet were fabulous and people are still talking about our band ‘Flood the Floor’ (as recommended to me by Rockmywedding reader and real bride Lucie Sidwell) MASSIVE thanks to her for that they totally entertained us all. And it turns out I have a mutual friend with the lead singer, he knew some of my guests too – fate maybe? We asked if they could play ‘Unforgettable’ by Nat King Cole as our first dance, and they didn’t let us down.

We had cupcakes made by local lady Catherine at Honeysuckle Bakery, they were heaven! She dropped us round four flavours to taste, and after one mouthful we knew we had to have them! Delicious they were. Cookies and cream, Strawberry, Double chocolate and vanilla. I got the cupcake pennants from www.vintageglamblog.com. Our pageboy carried a ring bearer bowl by Paloma’s Nest www.palomasnest.com and our favours were by the wonderful Kate Aspen they very kindly sent me some samples and I had a job to choose which to pick but the lovebird salt and pepper shakers went down really well! Matt decided they weren’t manly enough and so he ordered the men miniature bottles of Whiskey.

The jam jars I collected over the 18 months of wedding planning looked great, although if I see another jam jar again soon I might just keel over! I think the country chic look I was going for worked though and a fair few of our guests took the jam jar flower arrangements home with them! We only had a tiny number of favours left behind too so they were definitely worth it! We didn’t have a standard guest book, but found a ‘Make a Wish, Take a Wish’ through Etsy. They use the colours of your wedding and personalise it for you, we were left with some lovely wishes from our guests for our future as man and wife ‘Always keep your anti freeze topped up’ was one of them which made us laugh. The best man presented Matt with an Arsenal shirt and a marker pen for guests to leave messages on, which we’re going to get framed and find a home for! Our table numbers were from Hobbycraft, which we spraypainted in antique white and leaned against the centrepieces.

Our heartshaped chalkboard for the ‘Just Married’ sign is from Van Hagues. The bridesmaids hair flowers were from New Look (and they matched the dresses perfectly! Good old New Look!) The gorgeous Brian The Camper we hired from Vanilla Splits and can’t wait to hire him for our anniversary and go off for a weekend! Our rings came from our local family run Jeweller Equinox, who Matts family have used for many years and they gave us a brilliant service.

My Favourite Moment

My best part was feeling so strong and happy walking up the aisle, focusing on Matt and seeing how choked up he was. I walked on air up the aisle to a beautifully classical piece of music and seeing the impact it had on Matt was priceless. I couldn’t have asked for more, the moment I arrived next to him and he told me how beautiful I looked just made my heart bang even harder in my chest!

My Not So Favourite Moment

Walking through bramble bushes for a photo and ripping my dress to shreds……

My Advice To Other Brides-To-Be

Is Simple.

Don’t sweat the small details – focus on the love and the celebration with the people you love.

Get a good photographer. Good doesn’t have to mean pricey! Both Kim Hawkins and Jon Mold were outstanding I can’t praise them both enough, and considering Jon Mold is new to the Wedding industry (which surprised me when I heard this!) he acts like a pro, put us all at ease and his images are stunning. How lucky we were to have both Kim and Jon on the day! He captured some amazing candid shots of our guests and the wedding party, which we can’t wait to share with them! He is the next big thing in Wedding Photography, without a doubt. (And he drives a wicked VW Camper!)

And if you find yourself getting caught up in wedding planning madness, stop for a second and ask yourself… ‘What Would Jenny Do..?’

Love

Jenny xxx

I can’t begin to tell you how sad I am that Jenny’s real bride wedding adventure is over……although it isn’t really is it?

Charlotte xxx

If you do one thing today then make sure it’s to take the time to read the piece Jenny mentions that was read during the ceremony. Especially the last paragraph. It is beautiful. Totally and utterly beautiful.

* All images courtesy of Kim Hawkins assisted by Jon Mold

Dressing Mr O

I just want to start out by saying that I am not a clothing snob. Especially when it comes to mens clothes, I haven’t the foggiest about lapels or cuffs or anything so when Matt showed me a photo of a suit David Beckham was wearing and told me that was the one he wanted my thoughts went along the lines of ‘hubba hubba now that’s a suit that works for me!’. Mr O has a family background in the rag trade, his Grandfather was a cloth buyer for a top gentlemans clothing manufacturer and the ‘clothing gene’ was inherited by Matt. He wanted a tailor made suit, something that fit him perfectly. I know nothing about suits but even I can see when a suit doesn’t fit someone properly and I felt really proud that he was taking his part of the wedding seriously. No chance of my husband to be turning up in a badly fitting suit – thank heavens!

He chose King & Allen to tailor his suit, picking a beautiful charcoal cloth, the best man would be wearing the same, and I had ties made from left over bridesmaid dress material. Matt wore the darker purple, Ross the best man the lighter purple, and my brother and the grooms father wore the same green as my sisters dress. We couldn’t fault King & Allen, it’s nerve wracking parting with 100% of the money up front but when you look at the quality and cut of the suit you can’t deny they look good. He accessorised his suit with a silver pocket watch, engraved with our wedding date on, and some brown brogues.

The Ceremony

Everyone was inside waiting. I could hear the string music from inside when the wind blew in my direction, and I could see how packed it was, the energy around us all was alive with expectation and excitement, an energy I will never forget! Our Rev’d came out to greet us and although I was only a matter of five mins late we got cracking immediately. The girls lined themselves up, the String Quartet started playing Pachelbels Canon in D, and off they went, slowly gliding up the aisle towards and expectant Groom (who I had previously asked if he wouldn’t mind watching me walk towards him so I can focus on getting one leg in front of the other without them both buckling beneath me!). I gave Rob the nod and we started our ascend up the aisle, walking on air and seeing tear filled eyes looking my way all I could do was smile. I couldn’t wait to be standing next to my love.

The look on his face was priceless and I knew I’d hit jackpot with the choice of dress and hair. He looked the best I have ever seen him look and whenever I remember back to that walk up the aisle it’s just dreamy. The light in the church was soft, the music was angelic, it was just better than anything I could have hoped for. Now it was time to say our vows and although my lip quivered I only lost one tear, we couldn’t take our eyes off each other. The highlight of my day was that moment. Saying the vows, and that feeling between us.

The readings were perfect, my Mums best friend Ann read Desiderata, one of the most profound pieces of writing I have ever heard and she read with such feeling that we all felt a lump in our throats.

Desiderata go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;

they too have their story.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,

it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.

The string music I chose for the signing of the register was Hoppipolla by Sigur Ros, and Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol – the latter isn’t one of my favourite songs in it’s original form but when it’s played instrumentally it’s just enchanting. The music we exited the church to was One Day Like This by Elbow. I get goosebumps when I hear it now. We’d done it, we were husband and wife and it felt so good. I actually leaped in the air with my bouquet and whooped a little bit!

Love

Jenny x

P.S All of the details coming up tomorrow morning!

* All images courtesy of Kim Hawkins who was assisted on the day by Jon Mold.

Rise And Shine

The nerves didn’t really kick in until the morning of the wedding. I had taken the week off beforehand to relax and prepare myself and had mentally booked massages and facials, and more massages. The reality was that no matter how organised I was there was still a shed load of things to do, and my phone didn’t stop ringing with people wishing me well or letting me know they couldn’t make it/asking if they could bring extra people…The day before the wedding I even had one person ask if they could bring their dog along to the Wedding Breakfast because they couldn’t leave it alone. No amount of promises to ‘pick up the poo’ would convince me that I wanted to have animals at my wedding! And did I need something as ridiculous as that the day before the wedding? Nope. Jaysus If Mr O’s family can all leave their dogs at home alone for a few hours then everyone else blimmin well can too! Suffice to say that we had a few empty chairs because of said dog situation. How charming……

Anyway besides being let down by people who I had previously respected I am happy to announce that despite a manic week of running around like a blue arsed fly, juggling seating plan changes, surprise guests, order of service issues (as in printing the darn things), hospital appointments and last minute dress issues (don’t ask!) I managed to busy myself to the point of not noticing where the time was going and the nerves were kept well at bay through pure exhaustion!

Six thirty in the morning, feeling (and looking) like the beast of bodmin, I pulled myself from my bed to the living room to try and force down a bowl of coco pops (been craving them like mad!) The sky was blue and I watched some news on the BBC. It was depressing me a bit so I put some music on instead to liven myself up and once I had finally ‘come to’ I jumped in the shower and it was heaven. This was the day I married my Mr O. Blimey. I was nervous, I was actually positively nervous! Finally!

At eight thirty we went to my hair salon round the corner, where Michaela greeted us with chilled champagne (nice touch!) and armed with my ginger biscuits (for my morning sickness which should actually be renamed ‘all day long sickness’) we got cracking on my hair. I had a moment, a few moments actually when it dawned on me that the church is going to be packed with people, and I’m going to be walking up it and holy moly they’re all going to be looking at me. Cue feelings of hot panic and dizziness! It passed as quickly as it came, thank fook.

My hair was perfect, Michaela had worked tirelessly on my hair extensions getting them curled to perfection and I walked out of the salon with huge hair, and lots of it. I was thrilled!

Quietly I sat down at my dressing table, alone, and prepared my make up kit, setting it all out in front of me so I could see all of my beautiful products. I had hours to get ready and once I’d been told off by my youngest nieces for rushing around I took some deep breaths and slowly started on my base. It was relaxing, doing my make up is always relaxing, but today it felt even more so.

The tension of the week was melting away, and although I had a hormonal break out of spots I knew I could cover them and I had plenty of time. I hadn’t realised my flowers had been delivered and my god they were so beautiful I just couldn’t help shouting about it for a few minutes, my bouquet was more beautiful than I had imagined and Stephanie had managed to use all of the flowers I had asked for, purple hydrangea, white ranunculus, daisies, lavender, lilac roses, my bridesmaids flowers were the most spectacular sunflowers I had ever seen they were vivid and healthy looking. This was going to be a good day. The minute I saw the flowers I just knew it. Then I glanced over my shoulder and saw the Tiffany bag sitting on the side…….

There was a note inside from Mr O, indicating that what I suspected might be inside was inside and I just couldn’t bring myself to open it until I was looking beautiful and had my dress on. So I placed it back on the side and saved it for later.

The time flew by but by 1pm we were all in the living room as planned, dressed and drinking champagne. I in my beautiful dress and my brand new diamond necklace from my husband to be. After a year of dropping massive hints (ok so actually dragging him into Tiffany on Fifth Avenue in NYC and pointing to the necklace in all it’s glory – you don’t get much more subtle than that!) and my bridal party all looking and feeling a million pounds. Emotionally speaking I was still as cool as a cucumber, no flies on me, but I had placed a barrier up inside my head purposefully. I didn’t want to fall apart on the day of my wedding, I knew that once a single tear fell I wouldn’t be able to stop myself. My brother was prepared for me to be pretty darn emotional but I think I surprised him at how strong and together I was! I could tell he was honoured to be giving me away, and he looked stunning in his suit. Mum would have been so proud of us.

My bridesmaids dresses are based on the lovely Vivien of Holloway swing dresses. When I took my ideas to Lolly she drew me a design, and we picked the different colour silks and I left her to work her magic. I’m glad I decided to have bespoke dresses made, I couldn’t find a blinking bridesmaid dress anywhere that was right for us, and if my maids were a little older I probably would have gone up the high street route to be honest! But not only did the girls look beautiful, they felt a million bucks.

Shoe Love

As you’ll remember from my ‘Which Jimmy to Choose’ posts I had my shoes made by Bespoke Big Day, gorgeous peep toe kitten heels in purple. I went to bed that evening with the most pampered feet, I didn’t need any plasters or pumps to change into they were perfectly comfortable! I even ordered myself a second pair in gold, because I love them so much.

By the time the girls had left in the campervan it was just Rob and I, we locked up the flat and made our way downstairs to wait in the fresh air, a lap around the block in the campervan and we arrived at the church. This was it.

Love

Jenny x

Hi Lovelies, Charlotte here

The Biggest Surprise

The the day before the wedding loomed. The weather had picked up it was positively summer outside the fact it was dry meant I was a very happy girl. I had an exciting appointment at lunchtime that day…. My 12 week scan! Yes for those of you who weren’t aware Mr O and I are having a baby! A lovely announcement for Matt to make in his speech! It was nerve wracking, because although I was still throwing up and feeling pregnant you just don’t know what’s going on, but as soon as I was on the bed in the side room and the baby appeared on the screen looking like a proper little baby with arms and legs I felt better. And the tears just fell. Our baby was waving at us and jumping around inside me like it knew we were watching and it was excited to be in there! It’s a bit mind blowing at first, especially for Mr O – the last time we had a scan I was only 7 weeks and our baby resembled a turkey (not much to get excited about there!) But now it’s a proper baby. And it’s due on 20th March! And it’s perfect. We came away feeling wonderful armed with scan photo’s to share at the wedding the next day.

We then had the arduous task of driving down to Chichester to pick up Brian (The campervan). Could have done without that the evening before the wedding too, how nice it would have been to be at home having a nice pedicure relaxing…. I do make life difficult for myself sometimes! It was worth it though, Brian was handsome and I couldn’t have chosen a better wedding car.

All in all the week was a rollercoaster of ups and downs and all I kept telling myself was that come Saturday I would be cool as a cucumber and promised myself I would relax and enjoy myself come rain or shine. The only thing I would have done differently is be much more prepared, and get little jobs done earlier on so that I could have had some time to just sit on my backside eating crisps watching telly.

The night before the wedding, once I had arrived home in Brian, said my goodbyes and good lucks to Mr O, my sister and niece came round with food and wine and although it was about 11pm by the time we finally sat down, it was perfect. I gave them both a heads up on what I needed them to help with on the big day, and they presented me with a gorgeous pearl bracelet, of which I placed with my ‘wedding day bits’ on my dressing table so I wouldn’t forget to wear it. I made it to bed before midnight, taking my little cat Molly and my scan picture with me. My last night as Miss Palmer, the excitement kept at bay by the constant nausea I’d been feeling for the past 8 weeks, I watched chunky Miss Molly wash herself which relaxed me. Cats are so elegant and graceful, I looked at my scan picture and I felt calm and complete. It all felt right, and sleep finally came.

Third Time Lucky

If you remember my rantings about dress issues then you will realise that the dress I wore wasn’t the Alan Hannah Martinique. Nor was it the second dress I opted for. The dress I chose happened purely by accident (I swear!). I visited Clifford Burr in Ware to view some veils, chatting away with the shop lady my dress story came out, I had concluded that putting the deposit down on the Alan Hannah was silly of me, 18 months before the wedding I was bound to change my mind about it but I had found the second dress from Milly Bridal in China and I convinced myself it was perfect. It was perfect, and I would recommend Milly Bridal to anyone looking for an inexpensive wedding dress. I had lumped out a phenomenal amount of money on the first dress, and I disliked it, the Milly dress cost me a fraction of the first one, and I loved it. Go figure. When I explained the idea of ‘The’ dress I had when I first started scrap booking wedding ideas when I first got engaged, it looked nothing like the Martinique. Nothing like it at all. However the shop lady disappeared for a moment and returned with a proud look on her face. She was holding a dress that I can only describe as ‘The One’. I tried it. It fit like a glove. Cinderella you shall go to the ball! Three wedding dresses though…. Isn’t that a little excessive of me?

The only draw back was Sottero and Midgely couldn’t deliver a new dress within the time frame I had left, it was 12 weeks until the wedding and they manufacture their dresses in China. Good old China. So she told me I could buy the dress I was wearing at a discount. It was brand new this season, it had been in the shop a month. It had not a mark on it. It didn’t need altering, it was perfect, the most perfect dress I had ever ever seen. Knowing how drastically impulsive I am, and with ‘Three Wedding Dresses Palmer’ as a potential nickname from my friends I asked for a few days to think about it. I knew I had to speak to Mr O about this, I was looking at spending a lot more money on a dress than I had already, yes it’s my money alright but even so, I needed clarification from him that I wasn’t totally bonkers. We talked that night, I had to sleep on it and promise that whatever I decided I would stop looking at dresses from that point onwards.

So I slept on it, and the following morning I made the call. I was the proud owner of Sottero & Midgely Toni – off the peg no less! Now I was faced with selling my two prior dress mistakes….. the second one from Milly wasn’t a problem I sold it on ebay and got what I paid for it (result!). The Alan Hannah Martinique…. Still for sale…..

I made the right decision. I look at our wedding images and I feel relieved that I didn’t choose the other two dresses. The Sottero & Midgely one was The One.

As for veils well, I ended up sourcing the matching veil for my new dress in a shop in Norwich who posted it to me the next day. I swiftly took it to Lolly (my bridesmaid dress maker) and she made me a lovely lace bolero jacket.

The dress story doesn’t end there though…. After the shock of my surprise pregnancy had sunk in I arranged an emergency dress fitting with Lolly. If it needed to be adjusted then it would ‘be a bit of a bugger’ but not out of the question so once we’d taken on board that I would only be 12 weeks on the big day, and that I had morning sickness like you wouldn’t believe (why do they call it morning sickness when it lasts the whole damn day?!) I decided that would just suck it and see, so to speak. My boobs had only gone up a cup size, and I had lost half a stone. Considering I was feeling like utter tripe the dress actually fitting me was the least of my problems.

My waist had thickened though, and wearing anything constricting made me feel faint and dizzy. It was at this point, (which was a week before the wedding) that I decided if it came to it I would simply change dresses in the evening, and wear the beautiful Martinique afterall. It really is a beautifully timeless gown, the cut is so chic and beyond that, it’s really bloody comfy! But the Martinique didn’t really ‘go’ with what the rest of the wedding party were wearing, and there was still a small chance that it too would be really tight and constricting. Oh buggeringhell. For my own piece of mind, so that I could sleep at night knowing that I would be ok on the day, I turned to my fail safe dress designer… Vivien of Holloway. I ordered the Ivory Lace Swing Dress and a white underskirt online, I already own a few Viv dresses so I trusted the size would be ok, and made a trip to Hobbycraft (last and final trip for a good long while I might add!) and bought some nice thick purple ribbon to tie around the waist thus creating a Candy Anthony inspired wedding dress. Voila! Job done. I could change into that in the evening so I would be free to breathe and dance the night away in complete comfort. Oh, and it turned up the day before the wedding. Cutting it a bit fine you say? Yes, that’s me all over. A flaming stress addict. So in reality I actually bought four wedding dresses. Is that some sort of record?

I didn’t change into the evening dress though, as it happened the main dress fitted me better on the day of the wedding than it did at my final fitting (morning sickness pays off then!). But having the VoH dress there as something to fall back on meant I could really relax so although it has gone unworn I may sell it, but I may keep it and wear it one day, perhaps for our baby’s christening.

The moral of the story here is I rushed into putting a deposit down on a dress too soon. I should have waited, looked around more, tried more dresses on (despite hating every minute of dress shopping) and given myself a bit of time to make the right decision. But it all worked out fine in the end. I have no regrets!

Kiss And Make-Up

I wanted a natural look, Matt isn’t a fan of ‘strictly come dancing’ make up and thinks I look more ‘me’ when I have my lashes dressed and a bit of colour in my cheeks.

So I went and got myself some Bare Escentual Mineral make up, my skin wasn’t quite at that ‘glowing and fabulous’ stage, in fact I had a hormonal break out and was covered in pimples. Fabulous. Bare minerals is good for problematic skin and I knew I wouldn’t get the coverage with any of my MAC or YSL products. I used L’oreal touch magique on my dark circles around my eyes, finishing with a few dabs of YSL Touche Eclat. I highlighted and contoured my face using MAC blush baby and MAC Well Dressed, and NARS Orgasm Illuminator, and on my lips I used MAC Plushglass lipgloss in Ample Pink. My mascara is Clinique High Impact in black. I used my favourite product on my body, MAC Face and Body Foundation mixing two colours C5 and C2, and used the NARS illuminator on my collar bone and shoulders.

Pretty simple really, the major job was getting a flawless finish on my base the rest of it took five minutes!

Love

Jenny x

It is less than three weeks until the wedding and I am absolutely shattered! Ever the optimist though it’s less than three weeks until the honeymoon too, which means three glorious weeks in Thailand (or ‘possibly the bestest most beautiful place on the planet’ as I call it).

Now that doesn’t mean I’m not looking forward to the wedding, of course I am that goes without saying, but am I looking forward to having my life back and not feeling as though I am boring people to tears by talking about the wedding? Yep! I can’t wait to have time to myself at the weekends, to amble around antique shops, and homeware shops, and clothing boutiques (err ok so Primark is a clothing boutique of sorts). I can’t remember the last time I actually did some shopping that wasn’t online. Ebay, Etsy, and Ocado are my new best friends. I simply don’t have the time (or the inclination) to deal with busy shops and slow people, and I suspect I may have become addicted to the thrill of arriving home to brown paper parcels on the doorstep!

Anyway my time is consumed with final dress fittings, bridesmaid fittings, hair trials, paying people, organising people, collecting jam jars, making menus and place settings, buying even more ribbon from hobbycraft, and pre wedding shoots. All this is done completely sober too, jeez I can’t remember the last time I enjoyed a nice chilled glass of sauvignon blanc…. **dribbling slightly at the prospect of wine** I make myself sound like such a wino I know, but sometimes life is more enjoyable when tipsy!

I have been speaking to my bestest friend Em in Aus, and can’t deny a small part of me clings to the hope that she is coming afterall and will make this grand entrance and surprise me at the church service, but deep down I know she is a new mum and it simply isn’t realistic to dream this way. I will just have to settle for another cardboard cut out (much to her entertainment, this will be the second wedding that cardboard Em has attended, despite being completely harassed and violated at the previous wedding!)

Nerves wise I think I slot into the ‘calm as a cucumber’ box at the moment. I really am cool and collected. I am organised, everything is ship shape and ready to go. Sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with me, for not being riddled with nerves and stress. My time on this planet has taught me well over the years, and stressing over something as wonderful as a wedding really isn’t worth the energy, not this far down the road anyway! It’s all about the cementing of love. Blimey that doesn’t sound too glam does it! Perhaps I meant celebrating love, or confirming love, I’m not sure anymore! My brain is addled. To summarise; Jens nerves are fine, but she’s as scatty as a bag of balls.

And here’s rather indulgent treat for my WJD followers…. Some images from our pre wedding shoot, captured by our photographer Kim Hawkins….

Introducing the fabulous Mr O, I think you’ll agree he’s pretty good looking (she says with a Zoolander twang)

We ambled round Shoreditch and Hoxton for the afternoon, on possibly the windiest day the UK has seen in like a million years. Still, impressive images and I’m looking forward to seeing how amazing our wedding images will be!

The countdown begins, 17 days to go.

Jenny xx

*Hi there Lovelies, Charlotte here. I just wanted to say that I love Jen’s writing – I often laugh out loud whilst formatting the posts! …..but this particular piece is my favourite so far. Real, honest and tug-at-your-heart-strings beautiful. Hankies at the ready folks.

Why I’m Looking Forward To Being Married

I’m not sure when it happened. I suspect it was when Mr O was down on bended knee proposing to me, when time slowed down and my surroundings had that blurry yet crystal clear ‘Matrix’ effect going on. I think it was that point, and that point alone that I considered life as a married couple.

I guess I had always known I would be with him, for as long as our relationship lasted. Sounds pessimistic but growing up in a single parent family only prepares you for independence and to be competent at being on your own. Who needs men eh? So marriage was never talked about, time frames were never talked about, we both share a love of travel, music, films, books, politics and our lives were happily intertwined. We had a good thing going and although time together hadn’t always been roses our relationship was tested on many occasions and we always managed to stay close and stay together. That’s life! Anyone who claims being in a relationship is easy sailing, is a big fat fibber. Life throws things at you and if you come out of it the other side able to heal and move on you know your relationship is very grounded. I never applied any pressure on him to make an honest woman of me, we were happy the way we were. I didn’t want to be one of those women who manipulated their man into getting wed. So when he produced a ring, and a speech, and the seed of marriage was planted on my finger and in my head, I embarked upon a journey of change and felt absolutely thrilled at the prospect of becoming a proper partnership with someone who I feel is my equal.

Love is a state of mind that comes from time and experience together. It isn’t being ‘in love’ that makes me want to marry Mr O, Ok so that has a huge influence on why I am doing it, but it’s what happens after you fall in love that makes a marriage. It’s the partnership, the friendship, the ability to know each other well enough to support each other through lifes ups and downs. He still makes me laugh, until my ribs hurt. He still tells me the same old stories and I still love hearing them. He knows which buttons to press to get me really riled, we keep each other very grounded. He encourages me to do things with my life, like when I sang in my favourite ska/reggae band 20 Dead Camels, he told me that because I knew all the songs already I could sing them in the band no probs – it would be great fun, and it was great fun I can’t believe I had the bottle to do it! He encouraged me to go bankrupt because despite working two jobs I was in dire straights when I met him and you know you’re in trouble when you can’t even afford the bus to work every day, let alone run my car. Best decision I ever made that was. He encouraged me to start my blog because he knew how much I loved to write, and he encouraged me to become a make up artist because that is what I am good at. He supported me when I had to care for my Mum when she was terminally ill. He put a roof over my head and food in my tummy when I was too depressed to function like a normal human being. He met me for lunch every day when I started my new job in London, because I didn’t have any friends there yet and I was nervous. We jump around at festivals and get totally mullered together, we travel and see the world together, because that’s what we like to do. When I think about ‘us’ I feel like it’s the greatest love story there ever was….. But then, I can imagine we all feel that way about our relationships.

We’ve worked hard to get where we are today, we’ve (almost) got the perfect life, and the perfect home. We make a great team and for that reason I can’t wait to say I do and become Mrs Oatham!

Love

Jenny xx
(photo courtesy of Me)

**in case new readers are wondering why the random photo of the Taj Mahal, see my first What Jenny Did post here, should clear things up a bit