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Summer & Robin: The Lingerie Dilemma

It’s almost 2015! I get married, turn 30, and loose 25lbs in 2015. (Yep this is my holy heck I’m getting old ‘Bridget Jones’ blog post.)

So one of my most deepest darkest wedding based conundrums, I really don’t know if it’s a massive faux pas to actually talk about it or not. The fight club of wedding planning if you will…

Sexy undies or control pants!?!?

I know I’m not the only one with this dilemma! Come on ladies, if you’ve been with your man for 10 years you don’t think twice about putting on giant pants when the occasion calls for it. My wedding day *should* be one of those occasions were I want to look a little less lumpy, but it’s so much more complicated than that!

Ideally I would just wear an expensive, sexy (not too sexy, like demure bridal sexy) underwear set, maybe even suspenders. To look my best though, I would have a thigh to chest skin coloured control body suit thing. I would look like a weird human sausage woman without my dress on, but with it on **boom** I’d look great!

I have considered doing a sneaky change from sausage suit to sexy lady wife as I get undressed at the end of the evening. The honest truth about that is I would never be bothered to do it, I would be too drunk, tired, happy to bother about sneaking into the bathroom to conceal my sausage body from Robin. The last option is to rock my sausage suit Beyonce style, and spend three times as much on a killer collection of undies for the honeymoon.

I’m not fully committed to owning my potential bridal sausage bod just yet. To be honest the women in the expensive control body wear on net-a-porter look great…but they are women that look great in anything. I especially like the ones that look like nude body con dresses, I think I’m going to have to hunt one down to try on.

I really do need one because, although my dress isn’t tight, it’s the opposite of poofy. I will not be a princess, there is no lace or netting or ruffles or anything. It’s so hard to keep it a secret, but Robin hasn’t seen it and I just can’t give too many clues.

My dress was the first thing I bought and I ordered it online! Shocking!! I know I know its a massive no no to order online, I love it though. I have said before it’s a Temperley dress, it’s not from their bridal range. All I will say is that it has 70s vibes…ahhhhhh 🙂

For my hair I’m currently channeling the 70s idea and obsessing about big Jerry Hall type frizzy curls. I have huge hair anyway and I’ve never ever considered hair extensions before (not for length but volume) I would love to try some out though. How do you match them up with your hair colour/type? If you have natural curls how do you curl them? I think I probably just want clip in extensions…my hair is definitely big enough for day to day giant volume.

We are going to hit the sales in search of Robins suit after Christmas. Wish us luck! He doesn’t have a specific suit in mind, but he is thinking he wants a light linen three piece suit to match our relaxed outdoor summer theme. Or maybe a brown tweedy wool number. We had ordered a linen Zara suit a few months ago but the arms were a fraction too short. Not enough for it to be a massive issue for any other occasion, but something that he couldn’t get over for the wedding.

Robins underwear isn’t something I’d thought about until just now. I suppose there are special mens undies, not that he needs control pants (not that he has nothing to control) haha. I had thought about getting him some posh socks to match his best man, but pants haven’t crossed my mind. And if they haven’t crossed mine they most certainly haven’t crossed his!

He does have to decide whether he goes for a tie, bow-tie, no tie. I think I would prefer bow-tie or no tie, but I’ll leave it up to him to decide. I’d love his accessories to come from a small handcrafted businesses. I know of a few brands that fit our style in the states, like Forage, but I’d love to find something similar and handmade in the UK.

For my accessories I am definitely sticking with my teensy diamond ring theme and want understated jewellery. My ring was handcrafted by Bittersweets NY and I love their pieces, also I covet anything and everything from Catbird (which also stocks Bittersweets NY pieces). I am thinking about some very simple gold earrings and a bracelet. I wouldn’t want a necklace, but I have considered a small locket to keep a little photo of my baby girl Celeste who we will be missing on the day.

I hope you all have a very very Merry Christmas and a happy super duper fun New Year!

We are planning on celebrating our one year engagaversary on Christmas Day at home ‘helping’ Emmett play with his toys and necking semi-posh booze.

Christmas kisses and love to you.

See you in 2015!

Bridget Jones



Author: Fern Godfrey
Fern spends most of her time dreaming about weddings and trying to convince her long-suffering boyfriend to propose. Lucky enough to live in sunny Cornwall, if you need her – you’ll find her at beach.

22 thoughts on “Summer & Robin: The Lingerie Dilemma

  1. I have that same dilemma. I’m going to need some serious ‘smoothing/shaping’ undergarments because my preferred dress is one of those that will show a VPL! So I’m thinking, I’ll probably go with a body control type thing, and have some sexy underwear to (hopefully) put on at the end of the evening. But like you, in reality I’ll be tipsy, tired and lazy! So I might just save the sexy suspenders etc for my mini-moon/honeymoon. Just an idea x

    1. Ah the dreaded VPL! If I did decide on normal undies my photographer is going to have a big job photoshopping my bum in all the pics. Haha

  2. Hello,
    Can SO relate to this article! I also turn 30 (as does my other half) next year and have been with him for 9 years. I’m getting married in May & am in a quandary of control vs sexy undies! To be honest I might go down the control route as it’ll be nice to feel svelt with minimal lumps & bumps. You’re also right it’s highly unlikely I’ll be changing into sexy undies when I get home! 🙂

    1. It’s nice to know other people have the same issues. I’ve pretty much come to terms with the lack of sexy knickers on the day. I’ll definitely make up for it though, maybe go all out on bikinis for honeymoon.

  3. I got married a few weeks ago and just went for my comfiest undies and a nude bra, sexy… Not! To be honest by the end of the day I was so hot from being in my dress all day, that I was glad I didn’t have anything fancy on. All I wanted to do was get showered and changed. Fancy undies saved for the day after

    1. The day after (or maybe the day after the day after, factoring in my inevitable hangover) is a much more sensible day to enjoy sexy undies.

  4. I got married in June and around a month before when I Knew what shape I was I went underwear shopping. I tried on everything Debenhams had – I am not exaggerating when I say everything! I went down the sexy and lacey route to start with and only found one bra that was a possibility. Then came the shapewear… My dress had a corset fastening so the high waisted pants were instantly ruled out as I wouldn’t be able to pull them up or down. Spanx are designed so you do not need normal pants underneath and have a funny gusset flap that keeps you covered up and you can still wee fairly easily, but they were so tight I would have turned into my something blue if I wore them for any length of time. Then came the waspie, the dress shaper that was like a flesh coloured boob tube to the knees, and various other contraptions.

    Eventually I decided to just wear the flesh coloured strapless bra I already owned as I knew it was comfortable, and I bought control pants that only went to my belly button and were made of the no VPL material. After trying so many different styles I went for comfort and I am so glad I did. The service I got at Debenhams was excellent – despite making a lot of work for the girls on the changing room they were so patient and helpful.

    Do make sure you try on your dress with the underwear, a friend of mine bought very expensive, beautiful, lace underwear for her big day but didn’t try it on with the dress beforehand. She had a shock when she realised the pattern of the lace could be seen through her dress and she ended up wearing a pair of her sister pants to get married.

    1. Great advise! I didn’t know spanx were crotchless, weird. I will definitely try my underwear and dress on together before it’s too late. Thanks I probably wouldn’t have thought of that.

  5. This is exactly the conundrum I’ve got at the moment! My dress isn’t skintight, but it’s the type that will cling and therefore I need some serious pants. But my dress has a sheer back, so they can’t be too long. I’ve worn spanx before and was so uncomfortable I nearly took them off at the awards do I was at and left them in the toilet (classy). But a wedding dress shop lady told me that the key is to get a size bigger than you usually would – therefore your lumps and bumps are lightly smoothed, rather than shoving all your fat upwards, so you get a weird tyre of flesh underneath your bra. If anyone can recommend any good brands, that would be amazing, as I’m still a little bit scared of spanx.

    I’m 30 next year too! Big up the married at 30 crew 😉 x

    1. Holy Moly. I’ve never worn spanx but that would be my worst nightmare to be so uncomfortable. Great advise of getting the bigger size. I second the plea for tried and tested brands that you can wear all day.


    Ekkkkk Summer you’re going to look amazing!!

    Fern x

  7. I got married in November, bought a beautiful corset type thing as I felt it would shape me better in my dress and spanx to hold me in and wore neither, I ended up going braless with sexy bottoms error! My now husband could not have cared less!!

    I wish I’d worn the corset, as much I adored my dress it felt a bit big by the end of the night and I think the corset would have helped fill it out and bit, AND I wish I’d worn the hold me ins because despite being completely unflattering when seen, they just do such a good job of holding you in!!!

    Also, my corset was a sexy number from house of fraser c£75 (the one that Abby Clancy models (In my head I look like her)), my hold me in knickers were from primark c£6!!

    Wearing the corset and hold me in knickers are both on my “I wish I’d done this……” list.

    I say if you think it, you should do it (wish I’d taken my own advice).


    1. Congratulations on your wedding. I think Robin would be the same and not even notice at the end of the day. Obviously I want to look my best, but probably more important than that I want to feel my best. I need to get shopping and trying things on.

  8. Sod the sausage lady look, you’re getting married! You’re going to look stunning no matter your pants, Robin won’t be able to keep his hands off you in any case, and you’ll actually be able to breathe / move on your big day. God, I hate body stockings.

    1. I’m for sure not planning on wearing anything uncomfortable, and I don’t want to pretend I’m two sizes smaller than I am. I just want something to smooth out the lumps and bumps from having a couple of kids. I have no fear of Robins hands, he definitely wouldn’t care what I wear.

  9. Have you had a look at the underwear range from What Katie Did? they do amazing retro undies and have a “glamour shapewear” section which includes Merry Widows and Corsolettes – they look amazing, v. glamourous and definitely no sausage look!

    I’m planning to get one for my wedding (also in 2015!) my dress isn’t going to be that revealing, but I love the look of them so much I want one any way!

    Good luck with the planning! x

    1. I just had a quick look. I especially like the corsolettes and torsolettes, who knew underwear shopping could be so confusing. To Robin pants are pants.

  10. Haha, I think I am joining you in this. I too, get married, turn 30 and want to lose x amount of lbs before the impending big day.. (6 months and counting). Plus I refuse to start my ‘get fit/get slim’ plan until January…who diets over Christmas? And although my dress isn’t super figure hugging, there’s certain lumps I’d like to hide.

    Reality is, my exercise plan probably won’t happen, I may lose a few lbs but probably enough as I want. So I think I’m with you, sexy underwear for the honeymoon is a much better plan than sexy underwear for the wedding. Everyone always just sleeps on the night of their wedding anyway, don’t they?

  11. Holla! This is exactly me. And I’m pretttty sure everyone just sleeps in their wedding night. Everyone who succeeded in throwing a kickass party anyway. Right?!

  12. Same dilemma and compounded by the fact that my dress is backless and I am not exactly small up top… ! Requiring support as well as smoothing over the wobbles and being VPL-free is shaping up to be a pretty tall order. I had purchased the Ultimo backless body, but despite removing the optional padding – it still shoves my boobs up to somewhere an inch-or-so underneath my chin and isn’t really the look I was after for my church wedding…

    1. Oh dear, that did make me giggle though. I hope you find something church appropriate 😉 big boobs are a whole different dilemma! I feel your pain.

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